Puzzle Of Us

Strange how quickly we forget
Where all the little pieces went
The place from whence we came before
Now locked behind the heavy door

We're so distraught by all the sadness
So taken back by all the madness
We look around with empty hearts
At the puzzle of us that's come apart

But we can mend our shattered souls
Arrange the pieces to fill these holes
And once we start we'll realize
How we were blinded by all the lies

We thought our lives were fading fast
But we have the power to make them last
Remember the pattern of the puzzle we had
Before it was broken and we felt so bad

Slowly but surely we'll mend ourselves
Hang our finished pieces back on our shelves
Then we'll have pride in what we have become
And cherish the day that we finally won

Reviews

[alesuriko]

Wonderful rhythm and rhyme to this piece. Such a beautiful message within vivid imagery. You metaphor was indeed accurate and well worked out. I particularly like the third stanza, it really shows the strength and dedication of humans to fix themselves when they realize their flaws or that they're falling apart. The opening stanza really drew the audience in, I especially liked the image of the heavy door, very vivid and blunt. Well done.

[PaperHearts]

I really loved this! I thought that the rhythm of this piece was just amazing, and that you managed to find the perfect words to describe how you were feeling at this point in time. There were moments where I thought the rhyming was a little off (for example, in the last line of the penultimate stanza), but for the most part, the poem flowed really well. I liked the way you used the puzzle metaphor, and how you referred to the puzzle pieces; it made for a really creative and hard-hitting concept. Great work,
~PaperHearts

[HorrorMaster]

Very cute, I love it

[heich]

cute..i love it..

[James Watts]

Very nice work and the message behind the words shines bright. It is tough to lose the closeness of one you love and then trying to reform that bond. Nice work.

[zombiikillah666]

emotional, from the heart.
great write.

[Tina Kline]

Love this! It's very inspiring and filled with hope. No matter what struggles and battles we go through, we can win. A very positive message.

[Miss Coral]

Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful.
I think that the rhythm was a bit shaky in some places, seemed a bit forced, but altogether, this was another great piece. Nice job. c:

[Norma M Sutton]

Beautiful!

[Kat Plunkett]

I agree with S.S,
love it:)

[Zeitgeist Manifesto]

I enjoyed witnessing the rebuilt spirit. This poem lingers in the memory as a time capsule to be released when we need it most. I was inspired by your words and it made me feel that we can all be redeemed. This poem could force a person to forgive themself for whatever ails them.