T.A.

Poem about a gal I met by sheer luck, who came off as a girl different and unique than any other girl that I ever met. It turned out that she was as basic as the girls I despised.

I made you grin, I made you smile, I made you laugh
However, in your head you were just being friendly
20 years on this Earth and I should have known better
Yet I still let you put me into a frenzy
Unique, elegant, breathtaking, must I go on?
"Everyone here looks the same" you told me
I was naive and believed every word
Those who claim they are different blend in the most, wouldn't you agree?
Charming, wise, attentive...feel free to stop me at anytime
We were surrounded by the world but to me we were the only ones speaking
Beauty of an actress, brains of a philosopher
I wholeheartedly believed you were different but, secretly you spent your whole time critiquing
Pleasant, curious, magnetic...I've got to get a hold of myself
Big blue eyes it would make any man's heart melt
Name one more indie movie that we both saw and I swear I'll marry you now
My heart says "speak boy! speak! tell her how you really felt!"
Nonchalant, rude, superior...there we go, tell it how it really is!
Social networks are the root of all evil and the bearer of bad news
My heart on pins and needles waiting for your heartfelt response
When it comes to girls like you, I'll always lose
Your delayed response was heartless, cliche, and a huge excuse
You called me sweet oh God how original
You're starting to look like one of them
The mist is being cleared. Your primitive nature is starting to look fictional
Over. Done. Finnito.
You had my heart beating as if I just drank 20 cups of caffeine
You're original. You're the last of a dying breed.
Wait, could you explain to me what your cliche Chinese tattoo means?
Finished. Done. Accomplished.
Sometimes I wish I could replay the time we first met, other times I wished we never crossed.
I'm content now I swear.
But I have two last words to tell you girl, your loss.

Reviews

[TL Boehm]

Name one more indie movie that we both saw and I swear I'll marry you now

I love that line. It does read like a story - a prose bit but there are some wonderful little end rhymes that give it a poetic feel
Social networks are the root of all evil and the bearer of bad news
My heart on pins and needles waiting for your heartfelt response
When it comes to girls like you, I'll always lose
Your delayed response was heartless, cliche, and a huge excuse

Well penned

[Keith]

Great poem! You have captured the awkwardness of trying to make contact with someone who is seemingly just playing games with you.

[Casner P]

Thank you Keith!

[Kristin Lee]

Oh the aggravating frustrations of trying to connect with people in this world! This poem illustrates those perfectly. Well done.

[Casner P]

Thanks Kristin :)

[KAOlmsted]

This happens a lot...meet somebody and think they're the embodiment of everything you desperately want them to be. They never are. I like the clever banter in your head here...it's as though we are allowed to witness the thought process as the girl's true personality reveals itself before your eyes. Well done. "Wait, could you explain to me what your cliche Chinese tattoo means?" xD I literally laughed out loud...I mean really...why do people do that and then act as though they have some Zen connection to the world simply because they have "Have a nice day" written in Mandarin on their forearm? xD

Nice work. Thanks for sharing this with us. (I should have read this one last night *laugh*)

-kimmer

[Casner P]

Thanks Kimmer I really appreciate it. It's unfortunate we got off on the wrong foot, but that's all fine and dandy! I'm going to read some of your stuff right now :)

[KAOlmsted]

Ha, did we?? You're too sensitive, pet ;-) It's my pleasure, Casner...I enjoyed the subtext in this...you've got an interesting voice!

[Rogue]

You had a well formed story in this prose and kept the reader engaged in it with the indecisive back and forth. I enjoyed the wording as well.

Nice work! :)

[Jack V.]

I love this! Not normally a fan of poetry, but good job! I recently felt this way about a guy so it hits home.

[Mark]

Intersting, makes me wonder what her story is.

[Stormie Sky]

This is really good :) I like it a lot :) your a great writer :) Great write :)

[Samuel Jack]

I like it, it's funny and like a little lyrical story. I have trouble writing long poems and keeping it focused. Good work!

[Gobinder Singh Dhindsa]

Very Good work. Pen On. Do u read mine to Time, Anguish and Why?