Paradigm of a Flawed Design

A science themed song about people wanting somebody to accept them the way they are

101010101010101010 Paradigm of a Flawed Design 101010101010101010

They tell me that I'm a paradigm of a flawed design

My hopes and dreams vaporize the instant they begin to crystallize

Their cold, calculated words are the catalysts of my deconstruction

Endless loneliness is destroying me just like a computer virus

Can somebody save me from

The robot that I 've become, my  de-evolution?

Alone I can't hope to win this revolution

They have me trapped in the wake of a silent shockwave

Of malware and pain, underneath this weight I suffocate

Broken on the ground I lay, my life's in cold decay

They see me as a prime ape, their hollow poetry I can't escape

They have made me cold-blooded and temperature's now absolute zero

I'm being laughed at and mocked by fate, right now I need a hero

To save me from

The robot that I 've become, my  de-evolution

Alone I can't hope to win this revolution

They have me trapped in the wake of a silent shockwave

Of malware and pain, underneath this weight I suffocate

All the things that I want to be are like singularities

Always out of my reach, two steps ahead of me

A freak show runs in my DNA, an outcast runs in my RNA

I am on the edge and I'm about to break

Can somebody save me from

The robot that I 've become, my  de-evolution?

Alone I can't hope to win this revolution

They have me trapped in the wake of a silent shockwave

Of malware and pain, underneath this weight I suffocate

errorerrorerror Can somebody save me from this state of erosion? errorerrorerror

Author's Note

Once again I felt like experimenting with a song. Are you guys getting tired of my experimenting all the time? If you are, tell me, and my next song will be back to normal. I tried to make this one have a science atmosphere, so tell me if I succeeded! I hope you enjoy this! :)

Reviews

[Katie]

Nope keep experimenting its real wonderful!:)

[DoormanDan]

I'm glad you think so! I will keep experimenting :)

[Tina Kline]

A very creative and impressive poem. Great descriptions on feeling alone, alienated and non-human. Very very well done here!

[Amber Lily]

Always feel free to experiment! I loved the science theme in this, made me happy that I understood all the terms! This would make a really fun song I think. Well done :)

[DoormanDan]

I appreciate the review. The song that inspired me to write this piece was 'Hysteria' by Muse :)

[prince digbani]

You did my friend, you were able to explain life mistery using something we all are familiar with

[DoormanDan]

I'm both glad and relieved to know that you think so. Thanks for reviewing this :)

[prince digbani]

You re welcome

[Falling Leaf.]

Wow. This was absolutely incredible. The use of binary in the beginning, the error message repeated in the end, the whole use of technology to describe the decay of the soul in this urban society, I just have no words. I cannot give you criticism because it is perfect. I love it so much.

[DoormanDan]

Thanks for reviewing. I thought of the binary thing and the error message at the last minute, right before I hit publish :)

[Cool Girl]

I like your experiments xD
This one was so cool!! I love the story behind it, and I love the fonts:)

[DoormanDan]

I'm glad you like it CG :)

[Cool Girl]

Im glad that I read it! :)

[Lizardo]

Not at all, I actually enjoy it a lot.
This poem, I love the usage of words with big font and the others with little, really gives you a rollercoaster in this poem. and I absolutly LOVE the meanig behind this poem
Awesome work Dan :)

[Mr_M]

This is wicked mate. I was going to say it will make a song. I loved the way it is laid out, the different fonts, the structure. I have not read anything like this on here. I think you should stay in the lab and continue to experiment. Goggles off to you.

[DoormanDan]

Thanks for the kind words. I suppose I will stay in the lab and see what I can cook up next :)

[Valentine]

No, not getting tired, just waiting for you to put all of that word knowledge into another good write. You most certainly have a gift of words. Kathie

[DoormanDan]

Thanks. Im glad you enjoyed this write :)