constructing heart

constructing heart

 

 

 

not your typical poet,

more an engineer type

thinks in equations, measurements

 

autonomous in nature,

thinks balance is procured with a level

 

(and level head),

 

his ink is an oil spill

on pure paper white

a blotch of sense

captured in rigid form

 

an anal retentive bath

of words

tidying up the bones

so everything is in its place

 

not your typical poet,

his slide rule mind

sees black and white description

he's a metaphor's antagonist

a haiku hindrance

personification's poltergeist

 

moving marvels of objects

throughout his works

with a pulley of strained semantics

fitting everything into its place

 

except feelings.

 

 

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

1/9/16

Reviews

[Solar]

>his ink is an oil spill
on pure paper white
a blotch of sense
captured in rigid form<

An oil spill is inimical to life - so this poet's poems are not just measure by perhaps slick in a deadening way?
A blotch of sense captured in rigid form - sounded like a Rorschach test - feelings interpreted on algorithms?

A vivid picture is painted in your poem - and it feels just right.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Solar.
j.

[MomzillaNC]

“Bath of words…” I like that.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Momzilla,

j.

[MomzillaNC]

:) :D

[andrew mitchell]

Constructing the perfect heart that cannot be broken but devoid of feelings, hollow, reminiscent of a Frankenstein movie plot to a degree. a clever piece

[jacob erin-cilberto]

oooh i like that...the Baron lives again....

thank you, andrew,
j.

[mattavelli]

Fun read, Jacob! Thanks for sharing.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, mattavelli.
j.

[softlyfall]

Dear right brain, i would like to introduce you to left brain

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, softlyfall...:)

j.

[Relic]

What an ending! Holy crap. I'd give anything to write a poem like this Jacob. Superb.


1000/100

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your really kind words, Tim...

j.

[Relic]

You're quite welcome Jacob. You're like a poetic machine.

[Corset]

Scaffolding and wires pull us up to the billboard of your mind constructing a world of containment, how do you build a heart without feeling? mechanics, semantics, what use is an empty heart? so well done Jacob!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Corset,

j.

[JayceeC]

I read this and wonder to which poet you refer. I can easily see this as you, although you filter emotion into your work. But I do see the precision in your work; each line carefully designed and constructed for a purpose. Your worn could never be considered clinical or cold though. The emotion runs through the background, sometimes unvoiced but sitting there, like a backdrop away from the spotlight.
Now if it's another modern poet, I'd love to read for myself. I only post to about one in every three or for of your poems I read. Sometimes there is not much to say without being redundant in praise.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Jaycee....actually it is not about a particular poet...as for me...mmm, they just sort of pour out, like Frank O'Hara used to write....

i appreciate your reviews, always...and your kind words.


j.

[JayceeC]

Mine pour out in bursts. It's kinda like taking a shower, there are breaks in between turning on the water, but once you do they those out without much more thought. You..Lol

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, it's like that for me too...like a conduit...a flurry, and its' over.

[Jimmy Yetts]

How come people who are "anal retentive" lose their s**t so easily?

Even a poet supposedly without feelings makes a contribution, doesn't he, Jacob?
Vulcan verse does have a certain appeal.
As always, you rock the Cafe!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your insightful words, Jimmy,

j.

[Einstein Noodle]

one needs to know when writing is going forced ..and be able to scrap the damnable constrictions ... music is based on mathematics .. so many classics were mere exercises in scales put together in ways profound ... lending bones to Romantics .. lesser so for poets .. stricter forms used by the oldies unarguably many of which remain standards of excellence .... giving birth to rebellions in freedom ... i agree with you wholeheartedly .. to leave out emotive substance is egregious .... just as well be reading the Periodic Table ... i hear a couple new ones are recently added ... straining and stretching ".... everything into its place" .... even a blank sky emotes a meditative ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm! ;)
E.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Amen, E. Amen.....

thank you for your words, exercises, yes.

j.

[Einstein Noodle]

:))) .............