constructing heart

constructing heart

 

 

 

not your typical poet,

more an engineer type

thinks in equations, measurements

 

autonomous in nature,

thinks balance is procured with a level

 

(and level head),

 

his ink is an oil spill

on pure paper white

a blotch of sense

captured in rigid form

 

an anal retentive bath

of words

tidying up the bones

so everything is in its place

 

not your typical poet,

his slide rule mind

sees black and white description

he's a metaphor's antagonist

a haiku hindrance

personification's poltergeist

 

moving marvels of objects

throughout his works

with a pulley of strained semantics

fitting everything into its place

 

except feelings.

 

 

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

1/9/16

Reviews

[Solar]

>his ink is an oil spill
on pure paper white
a blotch of sense
captured in rigid form<

An oil spill is inimical to life - so this poet's poems are not just measure by perhaps slick in a deadening way?
A blotch of sense captured in rigid form - sounded like a Rorschach test - feelings interpreted on algorithms?

A vivid picture is painted in your poem - and it feels just right.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Solar.
j.

[...]

A poetic analogy of a writer, but who? So very descriptive and yet, I don't know who it's about...

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, lynn....not about any one poet in particular...

j.

[jesserose99]

well sums it up just right I think. the top and the bottom of the poem actually seem perfectly constructed against each other with words, just like you were constructing your way through. 'not your typical poet', placed strategically at the right spots to make it's measure just so.

well, I thought it was splendid myself, it's hard to engineer feelings though isn't it.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, it is hard...thank you, jesserose,

j.

[Julia Ledo]

This reminds me of my father, he's a machinist, and he could be romantic if his brain was wired different. He can do anything, my dad, except feelings, he can't quite grasp feelings. He's a very solitary type, he has his hobbies but other than that he's content to sit back and watch. Yet my parents are still together and in this day and age it's a rare thing. But anyways, all throughout this poem I thought of him

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for sharing that , Julia, very much like my dad in your description...

j.

[Einstein Noodle]

butting in here ... :} wait around long enough for a smashed thumb or blood blister pinch ... i will give good odds the feelings would fly ;)

[emmajoy]

' .. his ink is an oil spill -- on pure paper white -- a blotch of sense -- captured in rigid form '

those words are immensely graphic... but then, your words frequently are.

Seems the world of any kind, be it scientific, engineering, sociological, artistic et al contributes to the width, breadth and depth of our surroundings. Like night and day, Winter and Summer, the differences each compliment the other, makes us and their exponents creators of... something, anything, everything.

Your writing always seems clear, concise.. but oh my, does it have more between not only the lines but the words!!! :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, emma...

j.

[emmajoy]

I try to repay your kindness to me, sometimes i almost succeed!.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

it's not kindness, i find much solace in your poetry...there is a soft, prophetic insight about your words...and how you use nature in your poems...'

[iand63]

And so it goes, as we all know
The world is constructed
Of hard steel and concrete

;)

Nice one J.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, ian...

j.

[Carolynn]

Great poem that seems to go way outside the box! I loved it!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Carolynn

j.

[Cryingkate]

That's alright !
Every good Poem needs a strong foundation.
Plumbed and level for a house of verbs that will
Hit the nail on the head
as he hammers his thoughts
With square-level verse :-)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your creative and fun review, Connie.

j.

[Lydia Shutter]

Oh yes, a place for everything and every word in its place.....I have a background in accounting and I am a poet. The two need not be mutually exclusive. Loved the alliteration here, "a haiku hindrance
personification's poltergeist moving marvels" Your poetry always "adds up", Jacob. Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

you are so right, they need not be...you are one of the wonderful exceptions to the rule...thank you for your words, lydi.

j.