a landfill of unfulfilled love

a landfill of unfulfilled love

 

 

 

at the disposal site

the crane kept dropping pieces of a heart

on a pile of emotional rubble

 

a graveyard of tear stained boxes

unlabeled cans of caring

like unknown soldiers

 

finding a final camp ground

to pitch a tent of tentacled longing

just before the waste is bulldozed

 

and all of the memories

flatten,

like the pattern on a heart monitor

 

when the refuse

is refused for the very last time

and ceases to exist.

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

2/22/16

Reviews

[Lyn Anderson]

A wonderful analogy again. A thought, and if you don't like it, feel free to ignore it, the refuse lines belong with the bulldozer stanza and the memories line fits with ceases to exist. I respect your work so much, and it is not a correction, but a suggestion.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i appreciate the suggestion...and will give it some thought...appreciate your honest critique...
read morei appreciate the suggestion...and will give it some thought...appreciate your honest critique...
j.

[Chris]

To me the last stanza just didn't fit... don't know why or what I missed, it just didn't. You had me tied until then.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

last refuse left of the heart....but hey, poems and lines work sometimes with some readers and not with others...i appreciate your honest words, Chris.

j.

[Chris]

I DID "get" that part and appreciated the word - it was the last two lines that threw it sideways... landfills don't refuse refuse...they compost and compact, churn and bury til the content IS content. Once filled they begin anew with the next bout of sun"dries"...

[jacob erin-cilberto]

ordinarily yes, just playing with words here....but i can see where it threw ya, my friend.

j.

[Chris]

You've a great mind and ready wit... and I really appreciate you being a friend. I may tease you but I'll NEVER deride you OR take you for granted Jacob. I'll be a foil if you need one but you haven't so far.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i think we all need foils...and Chris...you keep me on my poetic toes. thanks for that.

[Chris]

Anytime Jacob... anytime at all

[W.k.kortas]

Brownfields are, by their very nature, rich sources for poetry, but few dig so carefully. The combination of restrained tone and deft wordplay are combined to make the piece pitch-perfect. Virtuoso stuff, even by your standards.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your very kind words, W.k.

j.

[Alfred Kukitz]

Like an innocent soldier lost in battle never knowing the sweet kiss of eternity.

Beautiful!

Regards,
Al

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Al.

j.

[Norman 223]

I think this is probably the most descriptive piece from your pen that I have read. The images are poignantly graphic, yet beautifully poetic (I could also add "romantic").
I loved it.

N.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

wow, really appreciate your very kind review, Norman.

j.

[Solar]

A powerful and bleak observation on the fate of unrequited and unrecognised love and caring!

A wasteland conveyed with such poignant imagery - 'to pitch a tent of tentacled longing
just before the waste is bulldozed'!

j. from this landfill - a beautiful poem rose from the compost of pain.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Solar.

j.

[alifeacoustic]

The refuse refused, sublime writing Jacob. Your words have the power to portray the crushing and destructive powers that capture our hearts, only to leave that heart more battered and bruised every time, yet it still beats.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, alife.

j.

[ms. barrie]

oh my! I agree: this is just amazing...you have such an incredible
gift for words that it's astounding! your pen spills such a pathos
of the heart's psyche that it can't help but leave an indelible
mark on the reader's imagination. favs and 100/100

Thank you for sharing
~ x - barrie

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your very kind words, barrie.

j.

[DIVYA]

This is so sad and touching. The fate of love is sometimes so wretched and the end so undignified. That's why I sometimes wonder if it's better not to have loved at all. My heartfelt compliments on this powerfully worded poem Jacob.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your very kind review, DIVYA...

j.

[Corset]

Recently read a poem on Hello Poetry but the author is missing now, all I know is that it was author known as
DARK

it was called
"Which way to go"

They say
"Follow your heart."
But if your heart is
In a million pieces
Which piece do you follow?

it so fits with this, Jacob, love is never refuse, I like to think of it as Time capsules :) Remember those? You plant them and ions later someone finds it, digs it up and says oh wow, look mom a time capsule, someone loved someone back in 2016 and here is a poem about it. Kinda like reading Keats

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for that Keats' compliment, Corset....really appreciate your words....

j.