Ratso's cave

Ratso's cave

 

 

paraphernalia sits across from the 

unmade bed,

sheets of needles

ruptured skin of one suffocating

from the strong winds

that harshly exhale in the room

 

despite this, he cries

regard always a slow dissolving pillow

away

 

he begs for coin

he aches in his loin

for love

 

but his sweetheart is poking him in the arm

there is a bus leaving for Florida 

at midnight

 

but he is already past his.

 

 

erin-cilberto

12/28/23

Reviews

[poetgurl (Plainly Meg)]

I found this write emotional really, nicely expressed.
Love some of the metaphors as well.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Meg,
j.

[Soren]

It has been a long time since I watched the movie but there are so many metaphors here. How many addictions in this life. Is love itself an addiction? And that sunny clime of Florida just another image of heaven that is just over the horizon (unless you live there like I do from time to time) Another brilliant write Jacob.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

your review is more brilliant...thank you, Soren.
j.

[John]

Plato's allegory of the cave set in Midnight Cowboy territory, the dream of the late 60s turning into the harsher reality of New York in the 197Os. Here, the promise of the paraphernalia is unfulfilled and the jolt out of the dream, when cave turns to den, is painful, especially when administered by someone who is failing to foster another unreliable dream, escape to the sunny climes of Florida. The sparse, vivid detail of the poem evokes a whole life, grim in its specificity, but relatable. Who isnt trying to work out @the meaning of those shadows on the wall?

[jacob erin-cilberto]

"the shadow on the wall paints an image dark and small, but I'm not sure at 'tall it's my reflection"
Thank you, John...
j.

[Einstein Noodle]

nice title j! a walluping big word at start ... course had to look it up so thank you for my word for the day .. as a in the past carpenter ... i had and have kept a lot of paraphernalia cluttering much of my garage .. poor sop ... needles for sheets and there she goes poking him at midnight ... reminds me of the songhttps://youtu.be/k9sf7C7D3nk?si=VLbqAuVL3gdQZPOA ... enjoyed the imaging and painful nature of this one .. especially the exhale of the room .. very fine says i! Happy New Year old friend!
E.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind and understanding review,E.
Happy New Year back at ya.
j.

[emmajoygreen]

Too much for too many, tears unforgiven, love ungiven.. only the harsh shot in the guts. Where is A1 in this, jacob? Tragedy voiced in fine writing.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I appreciate you, em.
j.

[emmajoygreen]

That is very much appreciated, jacob. So much so, am always ready to have you advise me otherwise, sir. :)

[Chris Shaw]

his sweetheart is poking him in the arm

Another one bites the dust. A tragedy all too common these days. How does it get to this, you wonder?

Observed it and closer than I would have liked. Both women and men. Hard hitting j.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, always a wonder.
thank you for understanding where this came from.
j.