ONE NIGHT

ONE NIGHT

One look of your eyes,
transforms my virtue
into a nymphomaniac.

One touch from you,
compels my skin to
stand up and applaud.

One kiss from you,
breathes sex into me,
making me rise.

One night with you,
baptizes me in sin,
resurrecting me unto God.

Author's Note

Reviews

[writing mojo]

Great flow to this poem, "applauding skin" is a very good image to suggest from thoughts, like goose bumps and lumps in the back of the throat, I have been the foresight of this poem many times before..this poem wears a cloak all the way to the last line...lol after a night vision like that i don't know if god would be the right entity to see. good stuff

[Coyote Poetry]

It is not too short. Take great talent to make your point loud and clear in so few words. You did. The poem described someone who made a world turn around and get better. No wasted words. A amazing poem of passion and desire.
Coyote

[Angel's Lady]

Nicely done! I absolutely adore it! Well written indeed and definitely paints a picture of what to see!

Good job! And it's going in my Favorites.

[BlueEyedBandit]

I believe it's bold enough in word that it's length is perfect. It has an alluring way about it and indeed tells a story. I like it.

[Devons]

What's interesting here is that this makes me feel as though I've just read a love poem in the form of erotica. The reason for this is that it has a 'tribute' quality about it, and skirts around the edges of sex itself. The sensual appreciation of the imagery leads it away from the visceral and lustful, taking it into a spiritual world where the dedication to the physical pleasures of the flesh are more dignified and acceptable to comprehend. I really like the biblical paradox of the lines:
"One night with you,
baptizes me in sin,
resurrecting me unto God."
..Sin and sanctity exist side by side, and I think that is a very realistic and three-dimensional expression of the subject. As a whole, in fact, the poem manages to be titillating without losing its sense of integrity. Interesting work.

[.]

it tells a sensual story and no it is not to short, you have captured the moment perfectly..what can I say? lucky you :)

[lavina k.]

good work!!
No! i don't think its too short.
Its conveys what you had in your mind when you wrote it...
Thank you!!!!!!

[Cassi M.]

I don't think its too short. To me the length doesn't matter as much as how you tell it, and you told it well. I actually love short poems, they make things beautiful but still simple. Very lovely poem.

[Shante Payne]

This is not too short at all. It is right to the point, the speaker loves the way that this person can arouse sexuallity into him. You need not add anymore lines, it is perfect as is.

[Sweet_pale_cacophony]

When you began it did seem you were writing with a female protagonist in mind..this was subtly sensual..well written.The last three lines were interesting,strong in a way...but nice..it elevated love into divine and eternal levels.

[Liza]

it was subtle so i don't think it needs to be rated mature
it was sensual; an expressive write filled with insight of the emotions triggered by passion and admiration.