Advertise Here
Want to advertise here? Get started for as little as $5
Last Night's Fancy

Last Night's Fancy

A Poem by Frieda P

...i wish my pen could capture last night's fancy,
flight of divergent apparitions took my breath away
hallucinations of a dream so real it made me weep
for i saw your face high above the clouds
you appeared as an angel with chimerical wings,  
in their flutter released thousands of butterflies
each one carried a smile of incandescent light
promised posies of an altered moment & space
where poetry becomes reality traced on lofty clouds
amidst trances of tranquility & enchanted frivolity
so here i await on ink's flow with a fool's faith
of glinting endings and freshly burnish'd beginnings...

© 2013 Frieda P


My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Featured Review

There are those moments and dreamy escapes that the pen can't capture its essence and glory especially when it is about a special one in our lives. The time and space are surely altered for they reside in a different reality than ours. I think you have been touched by the transcedental nature of the spirit realm and you are feeling like a butterfly in the azure skies...Thank you for sharing ...:)......................

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Frieda P

10 Years Ago

What a luverly review Sami, thanks so much for your sweet sentiments.
Sami Khalil

10 Years Ago

My pleasure...Any time...:)....................



Reviews

The "ink blot test" of our true sight and our true voice...

It is a moment of peering into the mirror of our own desires and our own truths.

Glad to see joy in your evenings.

Oh, and glad to see you understand the quiet as much as the song... ;)
Nice quote!
Lovely write friend.

Posted 10 Years Ago


This is breathtakingly beautiful. I've missed reading your poetry. I hope you are doing well. You are never far from my thoughts and prayers. xoxo

Posted 10 Years Ago


Would we could capture these moments in their potency and you always do dear heart :) Hope you are keeping ok? This is beautiful as ever and moved me...your voice is dream like through your writing, spectacular x

Posted 10 Years Ago


I like the elipses at the beginning and end of the poem. Adds another layer to the poem's theme of ephmerality and impermanence. In fact the visual aesthetic of the poem including the picture, the all lowercase writing, and the font is really effective. I often neglect to consider the shape and physical appearance of my poem in my ultimate presentation, and you're definitely bringing that to mind.

It is a lovely poem light and transporting, pulling the reader away from troubles like a pleasurable sigh. But beneath the tone and the beautiful imagery there is a vein of despair. That the wings are merely chimerical, that the posies are promised by not here, that it is all a trance, a dream, a hallucination.
The moment is one of enchanted frivolity fleeing reality, a fool's faith. You've written a deceptively simple piece, and though I only recently joined the site, it's the best poem I've read thus far.

Couple of minor suggestions.

1. I might drop the comma on the first line as it creates a nice emjambement,

2. "hallucinations of a dream" might be redundant as both evoke perception ungrounded by reality. I like "a dream so real it made me weep" or "hallucination so real it made me weep," but it depends on what you're trying to achieve with that line.

3. I love the line "promised posies of an altered moment." The use of alliteration is really effective and it makes the phrase stick in my head. Also posies are so rich with symbolism of death, commemoration and rebirth. Just a perfect construction. That being said, the clause "& space" detracts from the rhythm for me. I'd drop the "&" and add "space" to the next line.

Really good job, I'll be reading more of your stuff.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Chimera wings, interesting write, dreamy imagery ...

Posted 10 Years Ago


A beautiful dream that hopefully leads to some new horizons. x

Posted 10 Years Ago


A nice write, that has a kind of 60`s hippie feeling ...

Posted 10 Years Ago


I loved this poem, I felt the kind of spirituality of it very strongly, it was surreal

Posted 10 Years Ago


A missing senses filled in array of beauty and wonder:) Beautiful my dear friend:)

Posted 10 Years Ago


I was truly charmed by passionate words... when dream state and reality collide life becomes bittersweet.

Posted 10 Years Ago



Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

1842 Views
61 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 4 Libraries
Added on November 16, 2013
Last Updated on November 16, 2013

Author

Frieda P
Frieda P

NJ



About
If you want to know me, read my poetry, it's all in there. I am a mother of three sons (my finest moments) a sister, a survivor and a little bit crazy. I lost my beloved sister to suicide, so you'll.. more..

Writing

Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..


Black Angel Black Angel

A Poem by s y e