Step To Me

I'm terrified and worried but won't show it

I want so badly to give voice

Reveal myself to you

But so reluctant to allow your choice

I wish to verbalize those feelings

The ones that are pent up inside

The ones that whenever you are around

I seem to conveniently hide

As soon as it will fly from my lips

Once it's on the table and set free

Things will start to begin

And the things I once knew will no longer be

There is a reason for my anguish

That breaks me down internally

So when you stop to look at me

Forget all of this and let's just be

My thoughts race jubilantly around

Thoughts of you and I

Most times these thoughts

Make me so happy, I can only cry

How can I keep moving

When you seem to stand still

How can I keep from trembling

When my thoughts are racing downhill

I seem to think there is something

Something that we have yet to see

Will you open up your eyes

And take a long look with me?

At what point do you move

and take a step ahead

At what point do you turn a stone

into a massive flowing river bed

Don't overwhelm yourself

With the numerous "what if's"

I can honestly say I never knew

Something like this could ever exist

You take my rapidly beating heart

And fill it completely full

Your caring soul satisfies my being

I have never felt this warmth of being so whole

One minute I feel your heart

That beats only for me

The next I am not so sure

If it is truly me that you see

I tend to over analyze the day

I worry and pick apart

all the things that you say

I have to stop and remind myself

Stop to look deep inside

Have I forgotten, it was you who found me

Right when I only wanted to hide

I shouldn't take so much pain

The worry causes too much heartache

I have the faith in your world

And wonder if you realize what is at stake

It's far too premature to dwell on the end

Some things I'll end up breaking

Just because they don't seem to bend

So for now, I'll simply go along with the ride

I'll dive deep within

Please steer the path clear

While you take me for a spin

 

Reviews

[Michael]

I think you do a wonderful job with expressing true emotion in your work. On that score, it is spot on. I do have a technical question for you. The poem seems to be 15 quatrains followed by a couplet. Most seem to use an aBcB rhyme while the couplet makes a nice turn at the end. You do drop rhyme at some points in the quatrains and that is my question, did you intend to rhyme? If so, it is an area to look at, if not I would suggest breaking up the ones there to weaken the suggestion of it.

Again, please don't think me harsh. My intention is to give you a critical review. It does not speak to the enjoyment of your work. To that end, it is perfect.