Frail.

A look at a time that I will never forget, and yes, it is really good to be back, I've missed you all.

A healthy mind had lingered into frailty,

Once bright with ideas and unbounded light,

I crash into pillars of madness and hate,

No way for me to win true this false fight.

 

A spark of hope smelt faint and without reach,

White coats come in, go out, take poking turns,

I wriggle and sear a thing never mentioned,

Please no, this poison runs free and it burns.

 

A final battle commences within ones very heart,

Wills stand strong for both man and the forlorn,

Make no mistake with a power as strong as this one,

My now friend, your name is hushed because I won!

Author's Note

As always, I want your honesty and spirit x

Reviews

[Ava Laveau 🥀]

From personal experience, sounds like someone who has been to a facility for mental health or just health in general (hence using the words white coats, and being poked at as if being tested). That is definitely a hardship and I could feel it being radiated throughout the poem.

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

Thank you Ava.

[Seamstress]

Sounds like a grand battle that you have won. Congrats on that.

[PurpleQuartz]

This was a wonderful write!

[R. L. Ives]

I'm glad for you that you overcame something in your life that sounds like pretty significant. This is my first time reading your writes, and I have to say I'm glad your back too. Your writing is beauty in fluid motion.

[Aidz]

in this I taste, I live in your veins and am guided by words spun out of tune.....

[Tardisbaby]

I really like the ending of this.

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

thank you

[scottpax]

It's too cluttered, and there's no rhythm.

There seems to be a confusion in tense form. It really is a messy poem.

You don't use the Dark and Light cliche very well too. You should work on introverting the poem. Make it "you".

[Poetic Beauty]

The battles within the mind can be quite consuming and difficult to get a handle on at times. There are issues out of our own control and therefore sometimes we need help to get righted again.

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

thank you

[Poetic Beauty]

you are most welcome

[dillonjensen]

A truly great poem. "A spark of hope smelt faint and without reach." Well done, sir, well done! I'm certain many people can relate to that, most of which are still here to tell there tales. So maybe it's not hope they are reaching for, but definitely reaching for something. Nicely written.

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

thank you dillion

[Antonio Valentino]

oiyy.. ive met this feeling before, didnt care for its handshake it wouldnt let go

the last line in your first verse makes one's head need scratching.. the words, true, and false inserted in there nicely, give the thought choices of roads it can follow

oh how the second tier describes such helpless agony.. makes one cringe especially at the end

always nice to hear triumph o'er tragedy.. the way the story stitched it all up

Frail? I dont know? Or was it more the overcoming of such

nicely penned my friend
thanks for treating us with your artful experiences

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

thank you