Examining the idea of teenage and young adult parenting

Teenage and young adult parenting: if you can relate to this in any way, check this one out for a second and spread the word!

Examining the idea of teenage and young adult parenting

By C.J. Dunlap and M.K. Alexander

 

Let me start this paper off with a quick question to our readers: Ever heard of the saying 'babies raising babies'? Nine times out of ten, you probably have from one source or another, maybe a parent, a mentor, or otherwise. If you have not, and even if you have, you might want to take a closer look at this particular work. In this paper, we will be looking at this steadily increasing trend in American culture, that of teen and young adult parenting; its stigmas, the reasoning behind it, and some generally helpful advice and tips if you are of this increasing majority that can actually relate to this on a personal level.

For starters, let's face the facts: teenage pregnancies are happening more and more every day, and it's becoming almost commonplace to see a young family of three, four, or even more with a combined age of fifty. Personally for me (C.J Dunlap speaking here), I myself have two kids and a fiancé, and I'm only 22. Saying that, I know the struggle of having a young family that in certain regards I probably wasn't 100 percent ready for, but who really is? Even the stereotypical family that has attained the American Dream isn't truly prepared for a child, so what in the world makes a teenager think that they are?

Well, a child in most respects isn't on the top of a teenager's list on things important, but I can tell you one thing that is: sex. Yeah, we have health classes in school, and yeah, there is a certain heightened awareness when it comes to teenage parenting and pregnancies, but all that 'awareness' pales in comparison to the far reaching influence of pop culture. Teens have a mindset for the here and now, for what is 'in' and what is 'cool', and pop culture pretty much is the cultural definition thereof. Now for all of that 'awareness', how much can it really do against all the television shows, the music, the movies, etc., that in its own way does more to glamorize teen pregnancies and relationships than it does to draw awareness to the real consequences of said actions? I mean seriously, MTV's '16 and Pregnant’, despite it's good natured roots, has become more of a pop culture phenomenon due to a bigger interest on the show being a reality series, without regard to its actual goal of spreading the message of teenage pregnancies' negative consequences.

Pop culture itself isn't just to blame for this increasing trend; there are a number of anomalies and different reasons that too can be associated with this subject. Even without a heavily based sex-sells mentality in pop culture and advertising, the mind of a teen is open and wandering, always ready to experience something new. This can explain the interest teens have when it comes to trying drugs for the first time, sex for the first time, traveling somewhere new, you get the picture. There's also that little thing that seems to do more to mold the mind of a teenager more than anything else: peer pressure. You get one teen surrounded by a group of friends urging them to try nearly anything, and its almost a certainty that the original lone teen is going to do just that (For parents: I don't care what your teen tells you; we all were teens at one period in our lives, so we as older adults should already know how full of gas a teen can be).

Now lets fast forward a bit: lets say you have a teen who is expecting, or you are a young twenty-something with a child of your own. Having a kid is a life changing event for all parties involved, and once you have a kid, despite what you might want or think, your life now is all about them. All those days of partying with your friends, hanging at the club, drinking and getting high, well, you can kiss that all goodbye. Unfortunately in this world today, especially with the mindset and mentality of most in this newer generation, that previous sentence tends to get misconstrued if not outright ignored. That my friend is almost as big a problem as teenage pregnancy, yet it ties so much into this particular subject that you can't truly do a dissertation on one without the other.  

The biggest reason that it's such a big problem: the actions of this generation directly influence the next generation, especially when talking about a familial influence. This generation especially doesn't seem to get that, as you have probably witnessed in one way or another. How many instances have you seen a young mother basically dump their kid off with their friends or family just because they 'need a break', that break being to go out and party like they did pre-parent days? How many young men do you know are on child support, just because they fail to, or just outright refuse to, care for the kid that they helped create? How many kids do you see every day become wards of the state, being placed into adoption or foster homes due to the irresponsibility of the parent? Trust me (M.K. Alexander speaking), I've actually been through the adoption system, and despite the 'better life' you might or might not get from it, there is nothing on this earth that can heal the scar of knowing that you were adopted and given up because your biological parent was too irresponsible or selfish to step up to the plate, or whatever the reason might be.

That isn't to say the above describes all situations; teenage and young adult parenting is extremely difficult. Why shouldn't it be: we are talking about 16-25 year olds trying to raise a whole new life from the ground up, with many of them simultaneously trying to get their own lives on the path to success. Child care, healthcare, education; just a few of the many new concepts a parent is introduced to with the birth of a baby, and for the young adult, these concepts can be daunting at the very least. Let's not forget the kicker: as a parent, above all, you have to provide for your child; food. clothes, everything. Job, anyone?

Now for some, that last paragraph has probably got you thinking about how to avoid all of this, at least until such a time comes when you're stable enough to think of supporting a child. If you're a teen, heed this bit of advice: think about what you do before you do it. Sex has consequences, whether those consequences are a kid (which in our humble opinion is more of blessing than a consequence), an STD, or otherwise (read: drama). If you can't handle any of the above, abstinence is a tried and true method. If you can't handle abstinence, there are plenty of methods of birth control, but even with these, be prepared, as no method of birth control besides abstinence totally works.

If you find yourself in the other category (read: you already have a child or two), remember that you brought something special into this world. No matter how stressful life might seem to you now, that baby boy or girl is worth all of that stress and then some. Remember that your kid(s) are the seeds of the next generation, so be a real parent and nurture them to succeed. Despite any stigma on teen and young adult parenting, it's not impossible to separate yourself from that and have a family that can attain the true American Dream. When it all comes down to it, it's just like what nearly every parent says when referring to their children: they want nothing more than for their kid to have a life better than what they had. Now you're the parent: give your child what your parents gave you.