I wrote this with my daughter in mind, but it is for all women that overlook their own unique wonder and beauty. By the way, the picture used is of my daughter. She is a beauty.
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The opening stanza is very strong and gives an immediate unique feel of the character you are describing. The opening line reminds me a little little bit of She's Not There by Santana, if you know it, it is going back a bit mind!! I like the way you relate to your daughters beauty and her so say invisibility, she will become much more visible as you put it as she becomes aware of it.
Wow Nautili! What a great poem and I love the way how you wrote this! :) At first glimpse I couldn't picture the photo. And I love the perfect essence that you have captured of your daughter and how you pictured it here in your poem LIke the saying mother knows BEST :)
I do not have a daughter, but I do have a niece. She is only five years old.. I hope she grows up not caring what others think of her and that she learns to look at herself in a positive way rather than a negative one..
My favorite lines?..
"Superficial eyes that scan,
and then discount her
as too ordinary
to be noticed or admired.
Yet how extraordinary is
this girl.
My longing is for her to see this-
her beauty, her uniqueness, her wit, her strength."
This poem is magnificent. It has great meaning, for anybody really. Great job, thank you for posting this,it has really brightened up my day.
100/100 for sure
Wow what an ending! Very strongly written. I too have a beautiful teen age girl that I want to be strong and self confident and yes to know she is beautiful
Making sense of faulted graces, taken for granted by others who only see the non-ordinary as something special. How pure is that heart of yours to champion such a soul, when it isn't all that simple to play the many many roles a mother must play in a life..... especially for her daughter. A hero "a silent one", a mentor, and a guide to understand and enjoy the relationship of emotions we are all connected to. I'm sorry..... a very classy, and genuine poem. Thank You!! Because of the poem: Beautiful Nautili. xoxo -Mark
The opening stanza is very strong and gives an immediate unique feel of the character you are describing. The opening line reminds me a little little bit of She's Not There by Santana, if you know it, it is going back a bit mind!! I like the way you relate to your daughters beauty and her so say invisibility, she will become much more visible as you put it as she becomes aware of it.
I've seen the sadness of people who cannot see their own beauty.(and have felt it myself) It's something they have to find ... most never will. It's not glamour magazine, television king and queen type beauty I am referring to. it's that inner beauty which shadows all superficiality. thought provoking write ... glad to have read it.
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
thank you, I hope she does find it, I think she is in the process of doing so..
The imagery...the words...stunning! I know this girl...she's a ghost felt by many. With two girls of my own..I hope this ghost will not make itself known...but if it does...I hope I can make them feel the tangible beauty within...I hope they never feel the pain of being transparent.
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
So do I, it is painful to watch and keep cheering from the sidelines...
11 Years Ago
It's painful to watch..when you know that pain. Many years later...I call them growing pains...it d.. read moreIt's painful to watch..when you know that pain. Many years later...I call them growing pains...it does get better...eventually.
Yes she is! Tell it to her every day and she'll never forget it...beautiful poem, hope she read this
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
i told her about it, but she did not want to read it......I don't know if she would be offended that.. read morei told her about it, but she did not want to read it......I don't know if she would be offended that I wrote about her angst, or appreciate the message;
someday when she is older and through it, perhaps.
The worst thing that can happen in the life of a woman is "nothing." To have her very essence drift away into the indifference of another person is the crme of crimes. The very struggle to discover and rediscover identity is a baby step toward the singular hope that someone will notice. Well done. I like your work.
When we are young I think most of us have little idea of our own worth. Lovely write, your love for your daughter shines here. The picture goes well with the poem also!
A Dream Within A Dream
Take this kiss upon the brow!
And, in parting from you now,
Thus much let me avow-
You are not wrong, who deem
That my days have been a dream;
Yet if.. more..