Are You There?

Oh may I cry

Before I die?

If I do will I get to see you?

Are you there in the air?

Watching me waiting for eternity?

How dare I prolong the wait?

How selfish and rude

You must think I am a prude

So I will go

Find my gun

Grasp it and pull

I will decorate the room

Just to find you

So, are you there in the air?

Author's Note

REVIEW!!! please:)

Reviews

[Rachel U.]

I've read through a few of your works now - my main criticism is about your flow and use of vocabulary. For example, "Prude" doesn't really suit the mood of this poem as a whole. And for the flow...hm. Try reading your poems out loud after writing them to test the meter and your punctuation. That's about it. Good job, bonita.

Wow this strikes me as intense

[J. C. Koch]

Thats some powerful imagery at the end of it. Its saddening, i get the feeling of losing a loved one from this poem

[Tara♥Undefined&h..]

very intersting. Dark and depressing but very good. I liked this one a lot. Whered u come up with the idea

[Tina Kline]

Wow! Impressive! Dark and chilling, as if your trying to find someone and you have to do it by dying instead of just being a suicide poem. I really like this one too!