How

A teen mother and father

 

How can you look me like that?

After all this times we've had?

How can you say those words?

Expect me not to be mad?

How could you hurt me this way?

Crush my heart in two?

How can you not see it?

Know that it's all because of you?

How can you watch me cry?

Not say a word?

How can you walk away?

Pretend you haven't heard?

How could you blame this all on me?

Act like you weren't involved?

How could you walk away from this chance?

This new world we have evolved?

How can you not want to see his face?

Watch him grow?

How do you expect me to explain this?

Say nothing and let you go?

How could you think I can do it by myself?

Raise him on my own?

How could you find it right?

Leaving your son and me alone?

Author's Note

This is not a personal experience but I know of people

Reviews

[snapstache]

Wow...
I dnt know how to explain it...
awesome and amazing and superb and all those really mean the same thing...
First, it flowed perfectly,
It had a rhyme scheme which I tend to lack at times,
I don't no words can't express how good you are.. :)
*.*

[The Lone Wolf Prose]

So very heartbreaking...The repetition drums into your brain, your heart, your soul even and leaves you feeling like the one abandoned. So sad that this happens.

Beautiful write
Keep it up

LW

[C.J.G.]

This is awfully heartbreaking. BUT very, very well done. The questions make the poem and truly catches the read and forces you to feel her agony.


One thing, in the first line you say, "How can you look me like that?". Did you mean "How can you look at me like that?"

Great job!

[Sabbath_Nikole]

Damn, very powerful, you capture the dismay and confusion beautifully.

[J. Alexis Balaguer]

Your poem captured despair in plenty of interrogations.
It's a good poem. Thanks for sharing!

Alex

[Zeitgeist Manifesto]

Man..This poem really gets to the heart of the matter. The message is really something that should be said in our society. Great poem!

[Brandon]

Great flow, enjoyed the read. Well done!

Wow
I really enjoy this, it truly describes the pain

[DownTheDrain]

Powerful

[.]

The subject of your poem is very good. It supplies plenty of tension for you to build and develop. The rhyme scheme worked well. Nothing stuck out or seemed out of place. What I would suggest for this poem is some specifics. I didn't really notice any images in the work. Nothing brought it to life, really made something stick in my mind, picture what was going on. Right now it's very general. That's the best way I can think to put it. General can be a good thing, but there are aspects to the poem that are sacrificed for it. I think you have the framework for the emotions and the basic plot, but it would be nice to see it fleshed out. Something like a sonogram picture, dark eyes sunken in static. When you add an image like that, it enriches the work, and brings the reader in. There's a greater emotional investment on the part of the reader. Like I said, I think you have a good framework for the poem, and if you wanted, you could go back and make this poem stand out to the reader.

[Emily Quinn]

a poem about a very real issue we can all relate with whether by personal experiemce or from people we know. it's sad but sometimes it could possibly better; why have a parent there who doesn't want to be? it could possibly have an even worse outcome then never having them there in the first place. It would be nice if everyone could be mature and take responsiblity, grow into their role but alas, thats often not the case. good write, keep it up