Give Geeks a Chance

Yeah it's supposed to be funny...but think about it too!

Some women like guys who are muscular and strong,

Or romantic ones who quote poetry all night long;

Some like the jocks who can handle their balls,

But these aren’t the kinds that I go for at all!

I don’t like tough guys who ride on their Harleys,

Or comedians whose humor can rival Chris Farley;

The only guys that can really do it for me,

Can be found in a basement playing D&D.

Or standing in line to see the latest Star Wars flick,

Or at home watching Star Trek--take your pick;

When it comes to lingerie, they aren’t too hard to please,

Princess Leia’s gold bikini always brings them to their knees;

Scientists say we like strong men who can hunt and gather

But today we have grocery stores—so what does that matter?

We like men with a great smile to pass down their great genes

So we don’t have to mortgage the house to fix Junior’s teeth;

But orthodontics may be responsible for Prince Charming’s smile

And you’ll be mortgaging yours like his mom did after a while

Tall men may have good genes to pass down to your offspring

So they can reach the top shelf—but does anyone stop to think

We care about appearance at the cost of what really matters?

Things like intelligence—that’s why many girls would rather

Drool over “Legends of the Fall” instead of “Revenge of the Nerds”

As far as I’m concerned Brad Pitt and the like are for the birds!

I like a man with bigger brains than forearms—if you don’t agree...

Then Good! That leaves more of the nerdy guys for me!

Reviews

[Doug Case]

Haha it's a really nice sentiment! It reminds me of those "I (Heart) Nerds" t-shirts that I've seen around a few times. But as far as the poem itself is concerned, you need to work on the flow. Based on your rhyme scheme, it seems like you're attempting a limmerick style - albeit with a different length - so I would suggest attempting to make it match the traditional style (unless, of course, you're choosing to do something with a twist - more modern). Your imagery, however, is very strong; phrases like "jocks who can handle their balls" and "Princess Leia's gold bikini always brings them to their knees" stand out on their own, while still maintaining the integrity of the piece.

[Anthony Ackerley]

Ha! I finally figured out what I don't like about this piece.

Ok, so there's nothing I don't like about this piece. So I should say, "Ha! I finally figured out what's bothered me about this piece since I've read it."

I like the imagery throughout, and without question the sentiment is one I agree with whole heartedly, but you lose the flow towards the end, and it takes away from the rest of it. I've always admired your ability to use rhyme so well, and make it sound completely natural (which is something I've never been able to do to save my life), but in this one, it seemed a bit off, and I think it has more to do with the structure of certain lines as opposed to actual word choice, which I had originally thought.

For me, problems started the third line down of the second bunch you have here..."We like men with great smiles...", first mainly because I read it wrong and misunderstood the intent behind them. Once I got past that part, the near rhyme of "genes" and "teeth" threw me a bit. Up until that point all your rhymes had been exact matches (some may argue against "gather" and "matter" but I'm not one of them), so it made it stick out more. And same goes for "offspring" and "Think". I think the near rhymes after so many exact rhymes made those lines seem particularly forced, and disrupted things.

Also, along the same lines, around that same time (starting with -but does anyone stop to think", you started using run-on lines that didn't have natural stopping points like the lines early on. Early, it was like you could reach each line as a statement, and then pair it with the next one to make the connection. Later, you would run the thoughts into each other, and it disrupted the couplet pattern as I read.

An example of what I mean (more for me than you as I'm on the edge of misunderstanding myself here)

Opening two lines,

Some women like guys who are muscular and strong,
Or romantic ones who quote poetry all night long;

Natural stopping point for both of those lines at the end, lets the reader pause, and the rhyme get processed.

Later lines:

Tall men may have good genes to pass down to your offspring
So they can reach the top shelf-but does anyone stop to think
We care about appearance at the cost of what really matters?

First two lines here go together because of the rhyme, but you have to tack on the third one in order to finish out the thought of the second line, and that in turn makes it feel like the end of the third line should rhyme "shelf" instead.

The stopping points are what disrupts the flow in the second half because they're so drastically different from the first half. Makes it seem forced and choppy in a bad way as opposed to natural and choppy in a good way like the first half. What would a word for choppy in a good way be?... Hmmm... staccato? Rhythmic. Yeah, that works.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

You know they say that to each his own, we all have qualities we are attracted too... I myself am more attracted to woman who can stimulate my mind it makes everything else much better in a relationship... nice expression of yourself... awesome job!!

[Solst Rapture]

I enjoyed this. It is humorous and flows lovely. The only point is if you need a period after while? It just seemed to stumble there, very slightly. It was great fun, thanks for sharing it.

Happy new year.

[Angelheaded Hipster]

I sooo have to agree...I have mad nerd love.....I love a man with brains than a man with rippling forearms....Brad Pitt is not that attractive....give me Ducky from Sixteen Candles any day...

[Aryela]

This is really funny - but very true too....I know i give geeks a chance! (im almost one myself, as in love with physics as i am...) ;) The imagery is great...some of your lines really hit home! I agree with Doug Case to an extent though about the flow of the poem.

[Crazy Cat Man]

this is a funny piece.......makes to wish i was a nerd......haha........but i am part nerd so that counts right ? :D

[Gary H]

Ha! And I just spent my afternoon bicep building in the gym.....Never seen Legends of the Fall - Is that about people that can't stand up properly - Monty Python film??? I know someone who plays D&D all the time and he even has his own suit of armour and takes part in re-staging of medieval battles.
Star Wars/Star Trek..... Mmmmm. I'm more of a Trekkie. Actually if you suggested lingerie to any of the people you are talking about I'm sure they would be hard and pleased in seconds....
This is very amusing and I'll be interested to see what reviews you get from the gene pool!

[Celtic Cat]

LMAO!!! First, at the picture... then at your very well rhymed and penned verse. Absolutely brilliant! Yep, you can have my share of the geeks....got me a motorcycle man whose arms are only big cuz he works hard for a living. Absolutely wonderful write! So glad I turned my Read Requests back on in time for this gem, it's priceless!!!

[T. L. O'Neal]

This was a funny piece, but what good is muscles or looks if they're dumber than rocks? T

[T. L. O'Neal]

This was a funny piece, but what good is muscles or looks if they're dumber than rocks? T