Eve's Wish

Eve's Wish

A Story by Carnation
"

Eve was abandoned on the streets of London at the young age of 4. Ever since then she had to find her own way to survive. Now Eve is 7 and is fixed on finding mother, even if she has to die to do it.

"
It was Christmas Eve, London, United Kingdom. Snow was softly falling, casting shadows as it sank to the ground. The narrow streets were teeming with life as city folks hurried to finish their Christmas shopping before the big day. Markets were yelling out prices at random people passing by, desperately wanting to sell out so they could go home and celebrate Christmas themselves.
It was around there and then that a frail little girl stepped out into the crowd. She had soft blonde-white hair that fell perfectly to her waist, baggy pale blue eyes that could catch any ones eyes, and torn rags that were just that tiny but big for her. This girls name was Eve White, she was called that because it was the day of her birthday, Christmas Eve. Eve had been abandoned as a young child, with nothing but a small silver bracelet that had her name engraved on it, and a pink linen blanket that had teddy bear and heart patterns on it. 
Eve stepped cautiously into the crowd twisting her head both ways just to check for any danger. She quickly bustled through the crowd around her, yelling as loud as she could,  

"Mother! Mother! Where are you? Please, I just want to see your face!"
She was yelling this for what seemed like hours on end, but no one ever seemed to answer to her pleas. Eve had been doing this ever since her mother left on the street on that cold windy night. Eve could not remember a single feature of her mother, not even the slightest image. Eve kept running from street to street, town to town, always yelling the same thing 
"Mother! Mother! Where are you? Please, I just want to see your face!" 
But all she ever received were a few strange stares and a single penny, neither of which helped her in search for her mother. 
In the next town over Eve was starting to grow tired. She looked around for a seat but where ever she looked, it seemed to be taken. Finally she found a small water fountain and sat down there. It may of been uncomfortable but at least it was something. Eve turned her head a little bit to crack it, as it was now all cramped up from all the yelling a searching. That when she saw a sign next to the fountain, on the sign it had engraved; 
Wishing Fountain 
Throw in a coin of any type then make a 
Wish. 
For, if you do... 
Your wish will come true.
That's when Eve remembered the single penny that some one had given her. Digging her hand into the pocket of her ragged, faded jeans, Eve found the penny the stranger had given her. Holding it in her quivering nimble hand, eve tossed the coin into the fountain and made the one wish she had been searching for; whispering to her self,
"I wish that I could see my mother one more time before I pass away due to my frail little body that I so want to get out of." 
Eve pulled out her silver bracelet and held it tightly in her right hand, nearly making it go snow white. Then Eve pulled out her pink blanket that she had been carrying on her shoulder the whole time. Eve lied down on the hard concrete of the fountain and pulled the tiny blanket over her bare feet. Slowly closing her eyes, Eve knew that her world was coming to end. Still sad that she couldn't see he mother one more time, yet happy that if she saw her again Eve would be in a much healthier body than the one she is in now. And with that last thought, Eve silently drifted of into a never ending slumber. 
-- Paula White was just making her way to hail a taxi when she saw a little frail girl lying perfectly still on a fountain not so far away. Paula cautiously wandered over to the little girl, curious of what she was doing out here in the cold instead of in the warmth and comfort of her home. Paula carefully placed her pearl handbag on the ground and kneeled down to take a closer look at the young girl. That's when she noticed it... 
The small pink blanket with a teddy bear and heart shaped pattern on it.

© 2013 Carnation


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Author's Note

Carnation
Thoughts?

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Reviews

I love it! The writing was spectacularly written and from the first paragraph I fell into an abyss of deep emotion.

Posted 9 Years Ago


Carnation

9 Years Ago

Thanks for the kind words
Very sad. :( Nicely written though.

Posted 9 Years Ago


No offense, dude. Just being perfectly honest (:
The repetition of her name can just be "she" since Eve was the only "she" recognized here. Just that to edit ^-^

This short story was a great one and it made me mourn for Eve already. I can't imagine my mother leaving me and if she did, I'll be good as dead already.

Though in the real world, we surely can't stop people from doing this and we can never ask them to change when they always turn a blind eye to what really IS going on.

We live in a world where selfishness is one of the people's qualities and we can't do about that but only to live and try to change that selfishness on our own.

This short story was an innocent eye opener that really needs a reader and a reviewer who can share his/her thoughts (:

Great job~

Posted 9 Years Ago


Rhianne Ney

9 Years Ago

And I'm sorry it's not that positive
Carnation

9 Years Ago

No problem. I enjoy any feedback. You can only get better right
Rhianne Ney

9 Years Ago

Right, It will really help a lot (:
Great story!!!!

Posted 9 Years Ago


I love it! I can tell you are just going to get better and better at writing! :D

Posted 9 Years Ago


I like the story but I want to asked some questions. She was abandoned at the age of 4 then its already 3 years past because She 7 right now, I want to know what happened in 3 years did somebody help her? How she survive from that fragile situation. I think giving details how this girl survive could be a great highlights in this story. The story is great, keep writing!

Posted 9 Years Ago


Carnation

9 Years Ago

I'll see what I can do
oh kids...those angels living in our homes..it is really hard to feel a kid suffering. you have made me imagining Eve here all the time im reading and praying she could find her mother and feel the warmth of home. i was really sorry that she was lost, that she couldnt feel the happiness of being in christmas celeberations and she cant enjoy the way she was supposed to as a little girl...

i liked how you have described Eve drawing an image of her in front of me, i could simply see her through your describtion all the time i have been reading. i liked how you have described the christmas time with its crowd and cold weather.

very sad story but im happy that Eve could find her mother at the end. i liked how you have penned this with such nice words picking..

Posted 9 Years Ago


Carnation

9 Years Ago

Thanks for the positive feedback!

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Added on March 17, 2013
Last Updated on April 9, 2013

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Carnation
Carnation

The Shadows



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I created this account years ago, back in primary school when I was around eleven years old. I'm now sixteen and in high school, and only just remembered this site again when my English teacher said t.. more..

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