EVOLUTION

EVOLUTION

A Story by Marie
"

A science fiction story.

"

     “That’s a bad sign,” Thorpe said. “Listen.”

 

    Lucy gave her husband a puzzled look. “I don’t hear anything.”

 

     “Exactly. Birds on Corfus are always singing. If they aren’t something must be wrong.” Lucy looked at the purple trees with their stiff, straw like leaves. Thorpe was right. Usually there were tiny winged yellow creatures (what the Corfus natives called “kals”; what she and her husband called “birds”) perched in the branches, chirping their bell like songs. Something must have happened to scare them away.

 

     Suddenly there was a crash. It was followed by another one and another. They sounded like gigantic footsteps. Lucy heard a sound like a roar and a trumpet and a warble combined.  She turned to Thorpe quickly. “What is it?”

 

     “I’ve heard there are dinosaur like animals still roaming this planet. Corfus didn’t evolve the way earth has. Humanoids came into existence before the earlier population had died out.” There was another crash, and it was very near them. Thorpe lifted his gun. “This fires a hundred rounds, but they’re small bullets. They wouldn’t stop anything large. And it might be armor plated.”

 

     “We can’t possibly outrun it,” Lucy said. “What are we going to do?”

 

     “We’ll have to hide. Maybe--”

 

     Suddenly something gigantic and lizard like stood before them, blocking out all three suns. It looked like a cross between a tyrannosaurus Rex and a brontosaurus...as well as being armor plated. Then it spoke, in a deep but pleasant voice. “I am a Glofindel. And you…are humans?”

 

     Thorpe swallowed “Y-yes.”

 

     “Don’t worry. You have nothing to fear. We Glofindels are herbivorous.”

 

     “Are there more of you?”

 

     “More all the time.”

 

     “How is it you can talk to us?”

 

     “You’ll have to excuse me. I took the words out of your mind--not invading your privacy, of course.”

 

     Lucy shook her head in bewilderment. “This is too strange. We’ve been on this planet for almost a year, and only a few natives have learned even basic English words. Yet you speak it perfectly. Why?”

 

     “Oh. There is much you need to know. I will explain about our planet. The great Mandelo  created Corfus out of the endless green sky dust. The Glofindel bowed his head and struck the ground with his tail three times, in reverence. “He then juggled three pink balls, to give us light. With His mighty finger He dug the sea and filled it with red Bral (what you call water) to give us moisture. He planted purple trees that we might have shade. Then He made life." Again the Glofindel struck his tail on the ground.

 

     “Did it take seven days? Thorpe asked.

 

     “No. The process took billions of your earth years. What I have just told you is the story the Corfus natives use to explain the mystery they cannot fathom. They also have a tale of two infants, one male; the other female, who grew up to populate the entire planet. But humanoid life (what you call humanoid) came to Corfus in this way:

 

     A tiny one-celled organism crawled out of the red sea. It split in two, and thus was reproduction. Soon there were two-celled creatures. They became more and more complicated. Some sprouted feathers and became the kals which fly about. Others grew fur and claws and walked on all fours. There were those who stood upright and became what you think of as human.”

 

     “Something like our own planet,” Thorpe muttered.

 

     “Something like that,” the Glofindel agreed. “But the bipeds on Corfus--the fittest, the strongest, the most intelligent--continued to grow. Then began developing magnificent tails.
    

     Lucy looked at Thorpe. “Tails?” she mouthed. Just then they were surrounded by chirping, fluttering yellow birds. Some perched on the Glofindel’s head. All of them sang with joy. “Poor things,” it said fondly. “They’re still learning.”

 

     “Learning what?” Lucy asked, apprehension in her voice.

 

     “That Glofindel is now the dominant life on this planet. The natives are evolving into us.”

© 2015 Marie


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Featured Review

This was great, and I don't mean to be rude at all in this review. I am simply here to give my opinion.

I enjoyed reading this. You have a wonderful imagination, very creative. However, I also felt like you had a lot of story here, but you condensed it down a bit too much. There was too much to say, yet too little time to say it. This could be a fantastic story, it just needs expansion. Like, why are they on Corfus? Also, its a bit dissatisfying to be told things directly such as 'It looked like a cross between a tyrannosaurus Rex and a brontosaurus...as well as being armor plated.' It would be more enjoyable to describe me certain aspects of the creature, then allow me to piece it into an image. This story has great potential. Keep up the great work!

I'm not demanding, but politely asking if you would read one of my postings. After reading your self description it would be an honor to have my work reviewed by someone as experienced with writing as you are. It is a science-fiction story simply titled 'Alex'. Blunt and lengthy reviews welcome.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Marie

9 Years Ago

Thank you for your review and opinion. I'll be glad to read you work. I have not seen you on here be.. read more
Lord Guru

9 Years Ago

Yes I just started a few days ago. Some friends told me I should try publishing my work online, and .. read more
Marie

9 Years Ago

Well, I haven't found a better one. However, this more a site for poetry than for stories. You refer.. read more



Reviews

I don't know much about this genre, but I was definitely intrigued and left with wanting to know more. Wonderful read and great dialogue, in my opinion of course. Excellent work!

Posted 9 Years Ago


Marie

9 Years Ago

Thank you.
A delightfully intriguing Sci-Fi story ... Obviously if there is such a thing as reverse discrimination and reverse osmosis, then there must remain the possibility of reverse evolution ... Not a fan of evolution at all, myself, but in a fictional story anything goes as long as one has their ducks in row ... Or in this case, their Glofindels ... Witty, clever, and brilliantly entertaining ...

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Marie

9 Years Ago

Vaya con Diois!
Workvio

9 Years Ago

I would, I would sweet lady, but I can't seem to find him ... LOL! ... On to other exciting stories .. read more
Marie

9 Years Ago

Thank you; I hope so.
This was great, and I don't mean to be rude at all in this review. I am simply here to give my opinion.

I enjoyed reading this. You have a wonderful imagination, very creative. However, I also felt like you had a lot of story here, but you condensed it down a bit too much. There was too much to say, yet too little time to say it. This could be a fantastic story, it just needs expansion. Like, why are they on Corfus? Also, its a bit dissatisfying to be told things directly such as 'It looked like a cross between a tyrannosaurus Rex and a brontosaurus...as well as being armor plated.' It would be more enjoyable to describe me certain aspects of the creature, then allow me to piece it into an image. This story has great potential. Keep up the great work!

I'm not demanding, but politely asking if you would read one of my postings. After reading your self description it would be an honor to have my work reviewed by someone as experienced with writing as you are. It is a science-fiction story simply titled 'Alex'. Blunt and lengthy reviews welcome.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Marie

9 Years Ago

Thank you for your review and opinion. I'll be glad to read you work. I have not seen you on here be.. read more
Lord Guru

9 Years Ago

Yes I just started a few days ago. Some friends told me I should try publishing my work online, and .. read more
Marie

9 Years Ago

Well, I haven't found a better one. However, this more a site for poetry than for stories. You refer.. read more
I like the unique perspective. There could be a planet like this out there. Good story Marie.

Posted 9 Years Ago


Marie

9 Years Ago

Thanks. Yes, there could be such a planet...anything is possible in the universe...
There was a beautiful, sudden sense of being in your words... a feeling of being transported into the story... into the place... and learning very quickly how to survive... Such a wonderful glimpse of what's to come from you.

Posted 9 Years Ago


0 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Marie

9 Years Ago

Thank you. Had thngs been different, dinosaurs might now be ruling the earth...
I love they way you are able to convey so much with so few, but carefully chosen words.

Posted 9 Years Ago


0 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Marie

9 Years Ago

Thank you. I find short works are revceived on here better than longer ones.
Innovative plot line!
Fascinating, articulate and professionally crafted.
Excellent in every way, Marie!

Posted 9 Years Ago


0 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Marie

9 Years Ago

THank you. I think well of it myself. But it's good to know a writer of your calibre does too.
Marie, I agree with Woody, a very good unique Idea and one that you could expand on.
Will

Posted 9 Years Ago


0 of 4 people found this review constructive.

Marie

9 Years Ago

You're right; It would make a novel if I worked on it, but I'm not ready to do that.
Brilliant! reverse revolution? original idea for sure.
your stories, like your poems, Marie, are short and impossible to ignore. you can tell a whole story with so few lines.

Posted 9 Years Ago


0 of 4 people found this review constructive.

Marie

9 Years Ago

THank you. THis one isn't bad. It was actually published in something; I forget what.

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Added on January 16, 2015
Last Updated on January 16, 2015
Tags: dinosaur, birds, gun, tail

Author

Marie
Marie

San Antonio, TX



About
I have been writing for almost 60 years. Writers' Cafe is the best writing site I've found. If you send me read requests, expect me to be blunt. I don't like poor grammar, misspelled words or mistake.. more..

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