{1} "Just saying goodbye."

Meghan

"God, these boxes are so heavy!" I heard her groan from the living room. I rolled my eyes and walked out of my new bedroom, making my way towards Chelsea. "What the hell did you put in these boxes, Meg?! Your whole f****n' house?!" She looked really frustrated, which only made the whole situation that much funnier considering that she's this 5'2 blonde-haired squirt trying to drag a box across the room. I stifled a laugh as she placed her hands on her hips and gave me a glare.

"A little help would be nice." She gave me a pointed look, then stiffly pointed towards the other seven boxes that were sitting by the front door.

"Okay, jeez I got it. I'll do the rest of them." I raised my hands up in surrender and muttered "just like I did yours when your puny arms couldn't." I heard her gasp and then I felt a hand slap the back of my head.

"I heard that! Unlike you, I don't play SPORTS! So, forgive me for my puniness." I looked over my shoulder to see her arms across her chest and a big pout on her face. I stuck my tongue out at her and she smiled. "God, it's so great to have you here with me! I've missed you so much, Meg! It's been five months too long!" She hurdled towards me, practically tackling me to the floor with a bear hug. We laid there laughing our asses off, until she turned her head to me and gave me a sad smile.

No, Chelsea. Don't bring it up. Please.

"Are you sure this is what you want, Meghan?" She asked, her brows furrowed as she studied my face. I turned my head towards the ceiling and closed my eyes for a moment, taking in a deep breath before opening them again and slowly shaking my head.

"It's not what I want, actually." From the corner of my eye I saw her open her mouth to say something but I raised my finger and signaled her to let me finish. I turned my head towards her again, letting out a shaky breath before speaking again.

"It's not what I want. At all. But," I took another deep breath, "it is what I need." Her eyes softened and she nodded, but then just as quickly her eyes grew wide with excitement.

"We can bring back our Friday Night traditions!" She squealed, clapping her hands and standing up from the floor. This is what I love about Chelsea, she never dwells too much on the sad, the negative, or the bad. And she knows me well enough to understand that I don't want to dwell on them either, especially when I'm trying so hard to leave my past as just that. My past.

"Okay, finish putting those boxes away while I run to the store to get some extra food, yeah?" She asked, lending me a hand and helping me up. "Sure thing, Chels," I said, dusting the back of my jeans and nodding my head.

She was gone literally two minutes later, hollering a 'brb' as she walked out the door. I stood in the middle of the living room, finally having a moment to take in my surroundings. Walking over to the large windows that overlooked the city, I slid one open and walked out into the balcony. The air was cool, the sky a beautiful shade of blue and there were hardly any clouds in sight. As I held onto the railing and looked out, I couldn't help but think about Sam.

He would have loved it here.

Yes, he would've.

I closed my eyes and pictured myself walking towards the small park on the other side of Hillsborough, the one where Sam had officially asked me to be his girlfriend. It had been after the final game of the season, right before Sophomore year ended and he had turned down the party invitation, even though it was in his honor. He had said that he wanted to show me something and drove me here, to this very small park with the very big oak tree.

"What are we doing here, Sam?" I asked while looking around. The park was empty with the only light coming from the setting sun, it was quite the sight. Sam rolled his eyes and tugged on my hand, leading me towards the big oak tree that sat in the center of the small area. He had a small bag in his other hand, one that he wouldn't let me anywhere near, making my already curious self that much more curious.

He stopped once we reached the tree and turned to me, but he wouldn't look me in the eyes.

He was nervous. And I couldn't fight the smile that was slowly creeping onto my lips.

He cleared his throat, finally meeting my gaze, and the intensity of it made my knees weak. Finally, he spoke.

"I'm not perfect." I furrowed my brows at this. "But, I don't think anyone is. In fact, I know for a fact that no one is perfect no matter how hard they try." He shook his head, I'm guessing trying to make sense of what he was saying.

"But you, Meghan Greene, you are the closest thing to perfect I think the world has ever had the privilege to see." My breath caught in my throat and forced me to look down at our entwined hands, but Sam let one of them go and cupped my chin between his fingers, bringing my gaze back up to meet his before he continued.

"These past few months getting to know you have been incredible, hell they've been the best months of my entire life," he chuckled and then smiled. I was about ready to melt at his feet. "That day you ran into me inside the gym, best day of my life by far. Seriously." I chuckled at his over dramatic tone, meanwhile my eyes were wide as saucers and I was on the verge of tears.

"Imagine if you hadn't been putting your hair up, or if I had stood up just a second too late. If you hadn't bumped into me, I wouldn't be here right now telling you just how in love with you I am."

And then the tears began, not sobbing or making any sound, just silent tears that were slowly gliding down my cheeks. He used his free hand to caress my cheek and I leaned into his touch. "So, thank you," he whispered, "for almost knocking me down." I let out a strangled sob, laughing right after. He opened the bag and pulled out a folded piece of fabric, one that I recognized immediately. 

I smiled as he held the t-shirt out in front of me, a big number '10' stamped on the back of the shirt with the words 'Raleigh's Girl' right above it. I reached out, grabbing the shirt from him and letting my fingers trace over the letters, while Sam shifted his weight from one foot to the other.

I don't know how long I stood there, mesmerized by the promise that this piece of fabric held but Sam clearing his throat brought me out of my reverie and I stared at him wide eyed. I opened my mouth, closed it, opened it again. I probably looked like a fish.

"S**t," he muttered under his breath and dragged his hands down his face, "you hate it, don't you? S**t, I shouldn't have done this." He started pacing around muttering incoherent curse words and running his fingers through his hair.

"I love you, too." I whispered. He stopped abruptly, snapping his head in my direction with wide eyes. "What?" he breathed out, closing the distance between us and placing his hands on either side of my face. "What did you just say?" He asked. I let out a sob and nodded my head vigorously, "I love you, too." I said, a little louder this time. Sam wrapped his arms around me and twirled me around, making me squeal in delight.

He started kissing me all over, repeating the same three words.

"I love you."

He kissed my head.

"I love you."

He kissed my cheek.

"I love you."

"He kissed my nose.

"I love you." I said, placing my hands on his shoulders and bringing my lips up to meet his.

I had cried under that oak tree for hours, tracing my fingers over the initials he carved when we had made it to one year, even though I told him it was cliché. He didn't care.

The memories we had made throughout our time together haunted me, no matter where I went. Every corner of that goddamn town was covered in Samuel.

So, I left.

My mom had been skeptical at first, asking me where I was going and who I was going to live with. I had deferred from NYU for a year, but after explaining the circumstances under which that decision was made they allowed me to start in the Spring. And that is how I ended up here, staring out across the Manhattan skyline and closing my eyes to breathe in the air of my new life. I wrapped my jacket tighter around my body, the wind seemingly picking up speed and I knew then that it would snow tonight. I opened my eyes back up and let out a shaky breath, this is what I needed. A new place where the memory of Sam would be only in my head, as well as my heart, but not in my surroundings.

"You okay?" My heart leaped into my throat, forcing me to turn around only to find Chelsea staring at me with a worried expression dancing across her features. I rubbed my hands up and down my arms, giving her a small nod as I walked over to her.

"I'm fine, just saying goodbye." I told her, and she gave me a sad smile in return. She reached out and pulled me into a hug, I practically became limp in her arms as my emotions took over and a strangled sob escaped my lips. She used one hand to rub my back, letting me cry on her shoulder as she whispered words of reassurance in my ear.

"Saying goodbye is the first step in healing." I nodded in the crook of her head, my sobs becoming sniffles. "He would want you to live your life and be happy," she continued, "he would be so proud of you Meghan, for holding it together as well as you have." I nodded once again, this time letting Chelsea go and holding her at arm's length. She gave me a small smile, reaching up to wipe the remaining tears away.

I closed my eyes momentarily and calmed my breathing, all the memories of Sam playing like a movie in my mind. I imagined a little key, all the memories of him falling inside a golden chest in my mind until it was full. Walking over to it, I kissed the key and closed the lid of the chest, locking it tight and whispering an 'I love you' to it.

"Meg?" I heard Chelsea in the faraway lands of reality. I opened my eyes to see her staring at me intently, worry etched on her face once again. I shook my head, clearing my mind of the locked chest containing everything Sam, and looked back towards my best friend.

"So," I clasped our hands together, "what're we doing on this mighty fine Friday?" A little frown formed on her lips, clearly trying to figure out my sudden change in mood, but it was gone just as fast as it came and a wide smile appeared on her face.

"Well, a few people I met at NYU are going out for drinks tonight. They're pretty awesome, you'd like them." She practically oozed admiration when talking about her new friends, a pang of jealousy blossomed at the fact that my best friend was out making other friends. Stupid, I know. I pushed the feeling down and gave her a small smile. "That sounds great, actually. But we're 19?" She rolled her eyes and waved me off, as if it wasn't a problem. "They don't card, it's all pretty much run by college students."

So, I guess it really isn't a problem.

"Okay, drinks it is then." She squealed, I mean she literally squealed. I covered my ears, laughing at how excited she was about going out. "You'll love them Megs, they're so great. Charlie is so funny, you'll like him. Oh, and Savannah is such a drama queen so I'm just warning you. I don't know if Jason will make an appearance, he usually saves his Friday nights for the 'ladies'." She wriggled her eyebrows at that and I laughed.

Then, her wide smile faltered at the corners and she gave me a tight smile. "What?" I asked, confused by her change in expression. "You'll get to meet Sebastian. He's a little tougher to crack, rough around the edges, and he'll probably come off as super d****e-y at first so don't let that discourage you. He's a really good friend to have." I nodded at all the new information she was giving me, hopefully they like me. I've had little-to-no human interaction lately so I'm praying that I can still have a normal conversation with someone.

So that's the first chapter, I really hope you guys enjoyed it! Let me know your thoughts "

Please note that the first chapter was roughly 2300 words. In order for me to have frequent updates, the chapters from here on out will range between 1500-2000, but don't fret!

I will be doing double updates when I can, I have a full time job as well as family obligations so I write when I have the time!