Two: The Escape

Part two of Allwyn and Juuni's story

As they ran down the corridors of the guild towards their room, Allwyn’s mind was racing with questions, ‘How had they found her? Who could have betrayed her? What tracks did she leave? When would this end?’ Narrowly dodging a small group of children Allwyn careered through the bedroom door, scanning for her second quiver of arrows.

“Found it!” Came a muffled voice from behind a pile of cloaks.

“Found what? Your arrows are over here…” Came the baffled reply of Juunikyu.

“Not the arrows, cloaks. We’ll need to be as invisible as possible to whatever is out there looking for me, and now you. They won’t stop until they have me to take back to The Glade.” Allwyn scanned the room for anything else that could help their plight.

“Why are these people after you? What have you done that is so bad?” Juunikyu looked questioningly at her companion, realising she had never thought to ask this question before now. Even on that night when Allwyn had first arrived at the guild, she had never questioned why an elf was so far away from the Glade, let alone a member of the elvin royal family.

“I’m wanted for a crime I did not commit, I got scared and ran away, and now everyone is convinced I’m guilty.” Allwyn moved towards the door and took one final look back into the room and towards her friend. “You don’t have to come with me Juuni. It’s not going to be easy living as a rogue.”

“It’ll be ok, we’ll stick together, it’s what friends do”

The warmth from her friend convinced Allwyn that having Juunikyu with her through this was the right thing to do. Hauling the cloaks over their shoulders Allwyn and Juunikyu began their journey to the front of the guild building. As they reached the doorway the crowds of people had become a lot calmer and normality was beginning to return the great building. Looking out into the grounds Allwyn could see that the bounty hunters had moved on after not finding her at the archery range. A wave of relief swept over her body, it was a good job bounty hunters were to keep their identity private and that these ones in particular weren’t carrying masks. Creeping round the edges of the stone doorway Allwyn scanned the grounds, there was no sign of movement but that didn’t mean they weren’t there.

“We need to move quickly, southwards towards the outlands” Allwyn whispered. “I hate to admit it but there’s only one person who can sort this.”

The duo moved through the guild grounds not once looking back at the guild which had been their home for so long now. Allwyn knew this day would come, she’d been secretly suspecting it for some time now. What she did not expect was to have such a close ally in her journey to get her life back.

As they both reached the main gate, Allwyn and Juunikyuu looked at each other warmly.

“This is it, not turning back now.”

Reviews

[A. Cornelius]

A good follow up. A few questions popped into my head while reading it. The first was why aren't the bounty hunters wearing masks if they aren't supposed to reveal their identity? Why are these bounty hunters indiscriminately peppering the archery range with arrows? Shouldn't they be more presence? I also really don't feel any attachment to the guild. This is important because I feel like you're trying to make me empathize with her having to leave, a place that she's been at for so long, but I really don't feel any attachment myself. This is something that expanding a bit on the story can really help, I think. I realize that you're trying to give a fast paced feel to these two chapters, but if you move too fast, the reader is left with no reason to really care about what's going on.

Of course these are all just my opinions. Again, I like the themes and direction. And I appreciate the desire to write something based on an online RP character. My own book posted here is inspired by an online RP character as well. And once again, if you want a more detailed edit, I'm happy to give it.

[Yaooooooo]

Very well writen.
Keep up the good work and feel free to send me a request.
One!