A Women's Serenade (self portrait contest 2013)

Self portrait my adult life in poetic form..

 

A Woman's Serenade

 

I've sat beside the railroad tracks

and watched my life rush by

I've walked a long and lonely road,

I've sat alone and cried

I've built a mountain from a hill,

symbolic though it was

I've seen the destined eagle pass

in flight the way it does

I 've more than once been loved and lost

I've been abandoned raped and tossed

I've tried to climb some hills too steep

I've slid back down and there I'd weep

I've sewn together happiness

when family leaned upon it

I've raised and ruled a multitude

caressed them in a sonnet

I've Spackle'd closed the cracks of life

to try to keep them safe from harm

I've led them and I've walked behind,

sometimes it's been a funny farm

I shoveled through some knee high stuff,

I've paddled without an oar

I've sailed the seas both smooth and rough

and somehow reached the shore

I've worn a shell to keep me safe,

then allowed that shell to shatter

I wore the cloak of patience

and I've felt my patience splatter

I've kneeled and prayed beside the grave

of loved ones I have lost

I've raised my voice in godly praise

yet questioned him the cost

there is no perfection here,

of flesh and bone I'm made

I am just a woman child

whose lived a serenade

bj smith 

aka shallimarRose

 

 

 

 

Entered in the self portrait contest September 2013

 For more shallimarRose Poetry by title in my blog click link: Bits of Me...Table of Contents by title...

Author's Note

feel free....

Reviews

[wordwarrior]

Oh my this is just stunning. I felt so many emotions reading this and could understand all those metaphors that encase so many emotions. Brilliant writing that grabs the reader in and takes them on your inner life's journey and oh how many of us can relate to parts or all of this!
I adore those last two lines...simple and oh so effective.
Wonderful poetry!

[shallimarRose]

Thank you WW.. how sweet.. Yes.. I suspect that many have traveled these same miles and trials.. xo Rose

[RainDancer1997]

I'm just beginning my journey:) Hopefully I'll be able to word my journey beautifully like yours:) Well done:)!

[shallimarRose]

You are probably ending one journey (child and young adult) and entering a new one... Keep writing Rainy... I really think you have got something.. xo Rose

[RainDancer1997]

Thanks Rose:) and I will:)

[Trevor Jay Bloodworth]

Amazing, Shallimar. Really loved it. It was beautiful. The whole time I was just thinking about my mother. Great imagery, and great word choice.

[shallimarRose]

I am glad you enjoyed it Trevor... Makes me feel old.. but that OK cause I am .. lol Thank you for reading.. ShallimarRose

[Rita L. Sev]

I've sewn together happiness
when family leaned upon it
I've raised and ruled a multitude
caressed them in a sonnet

This is a gorgeous serenade, a flowing cascade of life's trials and victories. In that imperfection, there is strength and beauty. Very nice, Rose!

[shallimarRose]

Thanks Rita for coming by and reading.. I always enjoy reading your reviews.. huggs, Rose

[ShelleyA]

A lovely write about your feelings and life journey that any woman can relate to. Heartfelt and introspective. Well crafted free style metered rhyming couplets. Vivid imagery that any reader can appreciate and see in their mind's eye. Good flow and tone. Lovely depth of feeling. Lyrical. Very nice closing lines. Well penned. Write on!

[shallimarRose]

Thank you Shelly for your kind review and taking time out to read.. xo shallimarRose

[ShelleyA]

You're very welcome. Have a great day!

[Sam]

How do you do it? That is me completely every word, every line every image I have been there. I love the title you give it. A Woman's Serenade. The flow the message everything in time so perfect and beautifully paced. Well done my poet friend. Well done once again. Thank you for sharing.

[shallimarRose]

I am pleased you like it.. I suspect many women will relate to a lot of this... But every line? Yes we must live parallel lives... Poetic sisters... xo shallimar

[Sam]

Words roll off your tongue and to your fingers like water falls from the sky. So beautiful the pictures.

[shallimarRose]

Thank you again.. I was rhyming before I could write so the rhymes just roll out effortlessly.... I really enjoy writing free-verse but it took me years to be able to put together poetry that did not rhyme.. Your praise is humbling.. xo

[Sam]

As it should be. xo Sam

[poetry-kiddo alienbaba]

it is just a memory but a walk back from there makes it special more than the walk TO there...
the coming back to the present builds resolve and makes anew what has already been made
like in the aftereffect of a picnic excursion, or a party in youthful fashion
leading to unity and like-mindedness of the people of a nation.
This life-experience is the boat you carve to carry you from the present into your destined future that you have carved for you...guided by the map on your palms etched by the one.

[shallimarRose]

thank you for coming to read and for your nice view of this piece.. Yes it is a self portrait.. shallimar

[poetry-kiddo alienbaba]

done

[carol burgess romance]

Such a journey through life you have had...as a grandmother I can relate to much of what you say....enjoyed this very much

[shallimarRose]

Thank you Carol I appreciate that.. I am also a grandmother.. **smiles** shallimarRose

[J. J. Nightingale]

I can relate to each and every line ..
Whether it rhymes or not isn't really important
It's a Woman's heart showing through .. true

Nice ... Jazz

[shallimarRose]

Thank you Jasmine.. huggs!!

[J. J. Nightingale]

YRW .. :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

" I've sewn together happiness/ when family leaned upon it"

that is a fantastic line...well woven into the piece.

[shallimarRose]

Thank you Jacob.. i so appreciate your taking the time to read from me.. xo shallimar

[redflutterby]

Thank you for this beautiful and honest song of womanhood. Its a joyous but heartbreaking journey which is why in so many ways we are stronger then men. Your writing is filled with emotion and insight. Loved this!!

[shallimarRose]

Thank you so much for reading and your lovely comment.. i am rather new to posting here and trying to get around to reading everyone.. This Cafe is time consuming ... but that is a good thing I guess.. shallimar

[redflutterby]

I've been here two months...you will get used to it. Much
inspiration and support here. Sending you a friend request!!

[shallimarRose]

thank you.. I actually joined the cafe over a year ago but never used it.. I came looking for Chris and just kind of got caught up in all the great poetry this time.. xo shall

[redflutterby]

You're welcome!!

[shallimarRose]

Thank you for the friend request.. Pleased to meet you..