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Just something i threw together this morning.. lol

…...Green fields of tomorrow

where flowers never grow

…...touch and go promenades

trying to gain control

…....watching so intently

anticipations rush

….....bases forged of destiny

still waiting to be touched

….....looking towards a future plan

while judging every curve

….....chances that you're bound to take

still heighten every nerve

….....overtime vendettas

the night, the hype the thrill

…......longingly hoping you'll come home

perhaps you never will??

“kill the Umpire”

bj smith aka shallimarRose

Author's Note

Baseball fan here.. Feel free to comment, Critique, .. shallimarRose

Reviews

[Anna]

I personally hate and know nothing about baseball, so it doesn't have too much meaning for me on that side. However it is clearly obvious that this is about life as well. I love the idea of having a double entendre. One so simple as a game of baseball, one so complicated as to try to explain what the hell is this thing we are doing on earth called "life." Bringing back that feeling of home we all love and most of us miss. Another really great write.

[shallimarRose]

Thank you Anna.. xo Rose

[shallimarRose]

TREVOR.... I was replying to your post here about not realizing this was about baseball and somehow I accidentally deleted your review.. You said "" Honestly, I had NO idea this was about baseball until I read your little comment about it. My mind totally drifted off while reading this. I wasn't thinking baseball at all hahaha. Good work Shallimar." My comment back was LOL so are you saying that you were so bored you fell asleep? lol... I actually wanted to keep the baseball theme kind of semi hidden but thought the Kill the Umpire at the end would give it away... Thank you for reading and commenting.. xo shallimar

[Trevor Jay Bloodworth]

My bad! Haha. And no, it didn't put me to sleep. My mind drifting is just like it goes for a walk with whatever I'm reading. hahah.

[shallimarRose]

Sorry I accidentally deleted it darlin'... I thought I was deleting my own reply having made some errors but deleted the whole post by mistake.. my bad... xo

[Trevor Jay Bloodworth]

It's fine, it's fine! :)

[shallimarRose]

ok good.. would never delete a review not even a bad one.. ♥

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i think it is about both life and baseball...

the grass looks greener in other homes...like love would be better there..but baseball-wise...i thought of the cubs...theo epstein as pres. we are building..hope we can bring a championship home in my lifetime.

[shallimarRose]

Thank you Jacob.. Yes this can be applied to life I felt that as I wrote but deliberately wrote with hints of being at a baseball game... Dodgers ave been taking a quite a few extra inning wins... one game went 16 innings and I love that hype.. (of course i was watching from my home.. I would have never lasted that late at the stadium) lol Rose

[Rita L. Sev]

:) Love this! Read it through, thinking it was a good piece about life... re-read it and saw that it is a great piece about baseball! Very clever!

I am only a baseball fan when the Phillies are doing well... which they are not... :)

[shallimarRose]

LOL ... die hard Dodger fan since the seventies.. The fact that they are in first place has my muse in a whirl I think.. lol thanks Rita... xo Rose

[Sharon L.H. Kelly]

It must be nice to be able to just throw something like this together...jealous! Love your work.

[shallimarRose]

Well if its rhyme yes... free verse takes a while... I really have to concentrate to keep the rhyme away... lol Thanks for reading Sharon.. xo Rose

[Simon Welsh]

This is beautiful! I like.

[shallimarRose]

Thank you Elliott..

[ba_mcfarlane]

Two writes for the price of one. Well done, subtle with a bit of an O Henry at the finish line.

[shallimarRose]

Well the two writes quite coincidental.. Im a big baseball fan... lol thanks for reading..

[ba_mcfarlane]

My thriving metropolis (pop 4200) is halfway between Detroit and Toronto. The Jays, they are breaking my heart, I can't take much more. I'm going back to the team of my childhood, but I'm taking my life in my hands so as to see them live. I never liked them that much!

[shallimarRose]

Awww... Well they say Dodgers could make the world series this year it will be the first time since the eighties I think... thanks again.. xo

[B-poet]

I loved the written format you utilized here to get your point across. Catchy, intriguing, and a very well written poem. Great work showcasing your talents here. A interesting write & read. :)

[shallimarRose]

Thanks Bri, I have been watching a lot of baseball since my Dodgers upped their game.. I wanted it to clearly point in that direction without being to directly on center.. So glad you enjoyed.. xo Rose

[ba_mcfarlane]

The The Dodgers are cool. I despise Boston and Hotlanta.

[shallimarRose]

I don't like the San Francisco Giants... so I was not happy when they won the W S last year..lol thanks again .. xo