Let Me VAnish

I do not know how or what,
Nor do I know how to start,
Aching so badly, is this pain that leaves a cut
So deep is its pain, leaving behind the drops
Drops, dripping droplets, of blood, as tears……

I cry, with malaise, poking, throbbing in my heart,
Am stripped, torn and gashed, oh what else
Like kerfed into two….
This sorrow within me, only God can sew!
Slowly stopped the oozing of tears…..

Oooooo, let me smile, give me a simple smile,
I will come out of my woebegone world,
Take me, take me away, and let me
Leave behind all my blues, and
Vanish into peace, with some ease……..


Creative Mind #1 :D

Sep 1, 2010

• Poetry Challenge #2
• Let Me VAnish

Reviews

[deeps]

This is simply amazing.
I really enjoyed this write.

[Stephen Scaggs]

Dear Writer,

A very interesting piece that begs from line one to finish a concept of fathom ease and comfort. Is woebegone a word? Or is it woe-be-gone? Sorry, you'll find my complexity of English words to be lacking as I taught most of my vocabulary to me, myself. I did have to pull out a dictionary for a couple of these, so kudos on that. Always nice to grow and to learn. The first two lines really catch the reader's attention and has really great depth.

I have no room for improvement... besides you don't need to capitalize the first letter of every line. I find it distracting as it causes unnatural special emphasis. Either way, it is a very well written poem. Keep growing! I appreciate you! 9.9/10.

As a friend and a writer,
S. W. Scaggs

[Avocations of Amber]

So many times I've wanted to simply fall away from all of the outside world and do just as you say, "vanish into peace...."
I feel the pain in this poem, the reaching out that is being shown here.
Your words have so much veracity in them!

[Bette]

well done! we all wish to get away sometimes.

[Simple_mee]

A great write...The pain is well depicted...
A "simple" smile to a great writer from "simple_mee" ... ;)

[Dev]

I wish that the person's wish comes true.. He/she is seeking shelter from the pain and hurt that has been inflicted.. Really well written

[untoldtruth]

this is an excellent poem :) keep writing