Dear Gramma

A letter I wrote to my Gramma after I got out of prison.

Dear Gramma,

Hi! I hope this letter finds you well. Somehow I know it will. I am sorry I couldn't make it to your service, I heard a lot of people did though. I am not surprised.

I really wish I could have talked to you some more before you passed on. Just small talk. I reckon the important stuff has been covered in more than one of our past conversations.

I suppose everybody thought Grampa would go soon after you. As you know, he hasn't and doesn't seem to be in any big hurry. He's awful skinny but his eyes are just as blue and bright and ornery as ever. Rumor has it he is driving Hugh's wife, Tammy, crazy. Nobody deserves it more in my opinion.

He sure does miss you though. You made things nice for a lot of people when you were here and your absence is felt dearly.

 

I did my time in prison Gramma, and I learned a lot from it. But as the old song says, The blackmark follows me. I tried real hard to make everything allright for me and those around me when I got out, but even with a good job and a nice place to live, things just weren't the same. When you leave like I did, it ain't easy to go back. You know how important freedom is to me and that didn't exist for me anymore. And it wasn't so much what people said as it was what they didn't.

 

While I was inside I did a lot of reading. And the things I learned made me real mad. So when I got out I tried to tell everyone about all that I had learned and why it was important. They didn't listen. And I should have known that because one of the things I learned was people don't care anymore.

And I suppose that's why things have gotten so bad here in the US of A. It isn't that people can't see, they just don't care to look. They think that all those problems on the six oclock news are somebody elses. That's what I pay my taxes for, this one guy said. I guess he don't realize that if you give the control of your money and your trust to a government entity, he will damn sure take it!

 

I remember you always used to quote the bible and a lot of things you said stuck even though you know I haven't been to church in a long, long time.

You used to say, evil will become good and good will become evil.

Boy, has it ever.

You used to say the powers that be wouldn't have to take peoples rights and dignity, because they would eventually, through their ignorance, give them up freely.

Right again.

And I reckon that's what makes me the maddest. People are living in la-la land and don't even care.

Maybe Jesus is coming back, but he will probably be so disgusted he will climb right back on his sunbeam or whatever and get the hell on out of here.

 

So anyway, I moved to Mexico. It's real hard to live in a place where you don't know the culture or the language. But you know me! I may be a lot of things, and scared ain't one of them.

And here's the catch. All them years I lived up north and thought I was in the land of the free and the brave. Turns out it's the land of the weak and servile. I hate to say that, but I've run out of excuses for my fellow americans. But down here? It is free. At least a hell of a lot more so than up there. Down here people live day to day. It's because they are poor yeah, but when you think about it, why spend all your life working and building something that really has no guarantees anyway?

 

Down here your house is yours. And your yard as well. People here live in barrio's and everybody knows everybody. And no one is scared. The kids play in the streets without lights and supervision in the night. You don't have cops running around harrassing people for no good reason. Nobody dares shoplift. And you know why things are this way? Again, everybody knows everybody. Nobody worries that Carlito likes to cop a feel when he's drunk. The girls just avoid him. Because they know him.

Nobody worries about the crackheads. Everybody knows who they are and where they are at. No need for a bunch of new laws and more cops on the street. Folks watch out for each other. And if you wander your happy a*s down there and get hooked on drugs or beat up, well that's your own fault, because you knew.

 

So I am learning the language, I built me a house out of plywood and tarpaper, I got another littler tar paper shack out back, and you know what that is.I have a mean a*s dog to guard my corral. I go fishing on the ocean. I help people with their projects, I don't have to work much because I don't have any bills anymore! I get my water from a faucet on the street and the only thing I have plugged in is a little radio and a light bulb. My power bill was 8 dollars.This life may not be for everyone, but it just seems like camping out permanently to me! Plus being free and all.

Down in barrio La Cruz where I live, I have never heard anyone flip out about upcoming production quotas or rising insurance and pharmaceutical costs. Most of the time we're just looking for some shade!

Oh, it ain't all a bed of roses, and I have had my share of problems, but you taught me to work hard and treat people with love and compassion, and those traits pay off a lot more here than they were up there.

Finally, I know you used to call me crazy when I would say that when people die, their souls fly up and become stars, or else they come back as dogs, to help the children, but I see a star up there that I am pretty certain is you. If this is right, could you twinkle a little bit sometime, I'll be watching for it.

Love as always, Your Grandson.

 

 

 

Reviews

[Samuel Dickens]

I enjoyed listening in on your conversation with grandma. You're lucky, you know--my dad's parents died years before I was born, and mom's mother was....well, I'm not sure I could have ever had a heart to heart with her. It's good that you're able to live a simple existence---I wish I could. As always, this piece is very well written and I enjoyed it a lot.

[Desert Dreamer]

I'm happy to hear that there are places where freedom can be found...makes me want to tear down my house and build a little shack, keep it simple...a simple life leaves more time for freedom...but of course, there are always bills to pay, even if one can reduce them a few of them...I'm still stuck in the system, it is impossible to leave it behind here in the US.

A very well told story that deserves to be heard.

[cartera]

Interesting work. I am taking it that this piece is autobigraphical . Nothing like the simple annals of the poor, as the man said. There may be trouble ahead, but while there's a beer and there's singing, let's face the music and relax.
ATB
Alex.

[luciddreamer]

Breathtaking, beautiful

[Kennedy]

thats touchin

[cest la vie]

Damn T,
you made me cry..not for the losses but the gains..
This is written wonderful and I know Gramma is smiling and twinkling ..She is prouder of you than her new church dress I am certain of that..
Have to stop and go cry some more:-)

great letter...

[Manyfacets]

A warm heartfelt post. You held my interest from beginning to end with this wonderful read. Although it covers a lot of ground with your personal anguish I'd say there is a lesson here for anyone who is lucky enough to read it. Thanks for the post it's a grand read. Smiles M.

[Raef C. Boylan]

This is such a lovely read. Although it may be very personal, I'm going to comment on it as a piece of writing too because you should know that it's interesting and entertaining, as well as being moving.
I envied you the courage to start afresh while I was reading, and I'm pretty sure that if your gramma reads this letter, she'll be proud of you for your positivity, compassion and good sense.
I felt proud of you too. Mexico sounds great.
You structured this letter really well and narrated it at a good pace, building up the background before launching into more current events. I enjoyed the conversational tone; this is what a decent letter should be like.

Thanks for sharing this with us.

[Your Tasty Field Adviso..]

i love this story, because of how you show your love for your grandmum. reminds me of my lover's love for her grandmother that had passed into the life beyond. great story

[Chiquita]

This is a neat write. I could feel it. It made me want to write to my grandma. She is still here and alive. I don't see her often or talk with her. It is sad. We were very close once upon a time.

The write seemed to be very genuine and heart felt. I like reading stuff that is this real and true. Thank you.