Writing

The Basketball Head Diaries

A Story by Matthias Gregorius

"No food for 48 hours," there was good reason for this post-oral surgery instruction. The munchies led me to ignore it, and I was about to pay a horri..

Escape Plan in Dueling Banjo Country

A Story by Matthias Gregorius

The cop was pissed in the extreme, not a fan of our "Fast & Furious" style escape. "You think yer better than me, huh, huh?" Was the oft repeated line..

AM/PM Beer Cooler Takeover

A Story by Matthias Gregorius

A creative, if illegal solution to underaged alcohol access. Smooth sailing, until a cop appeared opposite me, staring right at me through the glass. ..

Shad Coulson's Beautiful B***s Destroyed My Reputa..

A Story by Matthias Gregorius

Woe unto he who falls asleep first at a trickster's sleepover. The very moment Shad's Mother is screaming into the phone to mine, Shad's boobies are d..

Crouching Gorilla, Hidden Drunken Dumbshit

A Story by Matthias Gregorius

Stuffing myself, in full gorilla get-up, into that recycle bin and lying in wait seemed like a good scheme at the time. 12 beers in, trickster dumbass..

LSD Church Dance: My Felonious Missing Wallet

A Story by Matthias Gregorius

I swerved to block the exit as the last car tried to leave. If they didn't have my LSD stuffed wallet, were the handcuffs all that remained? Was it al..

Nun Nurse Nelly's Vicious Backhand & Another Helic..

A Story by Matthias Gregorius

Another helicopter ride I wouldn't remember. Another ER Doc breaking the likely prognosis: veggie platter. A well deserved smack for the humiliating f..