Description of a Small Town

Small thing...Criticism

                 As the moon began to crawl to the center of the sky, the life force began to wither, leaving behind a skeleton of a once dancing town. Main Street, which earlier was overwhelmed with excitable vendors lined down the street, now stood quiet, reminiscing about the earlier time, when people with bright eyes and tinny laughs flowed in and out of boutiques, bookstores, bars, chatting and exchanging secrets in hushed tones about what Lucille will do when her husband isn’t looking.

                North of the shops, thinly layered trees intensify into heavily wooded paths, where light filtered through to softly illuminate the fairy circles that sporadically appear between the trees.  As nighttime falls, the moonlight is unable to slice through the treetops, leaving the ground an inky black. In the surrounding area, compact neighborhoods of one-story houses give refuge to the now tired parents with a child’s cheek resting upon their shoulder, looking past memories of their day to reach their destination.  

Reviews

[Warrior]

Great story telling. This did justice in the realm of getting the message across. Great message. There's lot of times where a story can have a great message to aim for, and have a lot of under lining things but then no one gets it, and if no one gets it, then the point has failed. But in my opinion this did well to get the message across. You made it clear, which is why I think it's good. Keep up the good work. What was also great was that I could imagine the story as I read it, and that is also a strong point of stories. The ability to have the reader imagine it because after all we're reading not watching it, but it was as if I was there as I read this, and that is great. Great visuals and great story telling. It had plot and substance. When you add substance to writing it gets that much better. It gets the reader hooked on it and make them feel as if they are part of it. As long as their is that emotional connection between the reader and the story then it's good. The connection you were able to established in the writing gives the reader a sense of comfortably that they are in tune with the writing. So that way when the writing is over, the reader wants more, and wishes it didn't end. I feel the same way when I watched a movie or tv series that I get so attached to, I never want it to end. And for this writing, I didn't want it to end. You had me hooked, and I am sure everyone else who read it was hooked as well. That is good, that is what you want for people to keep wanting more. The way you put the story together makes me feel like my life is different for that moment in which I read your story. I love it, and it was beautiful. Just keep posting stories like this, and you'll have a good following.