late night/early morning extortion

my first late night in a while,
I feel like I should extort it
for what it's worth...
the girlfriend's asleep,
the roommate's asleep,
and I'm hiding somewhere between

I really miss the sunrises
when I'm on my own free time
and not at work,
I really miss a lot of things that
I've been living without as of lately

I miss the late night/early morning
creative binges
that felt so full of purpose

all of my free time, nowadays
isn't quite free time at all,
I guess it's a sad sacrifice
for physical comfort and stability
at the cost of individuality
and sanity

it's hard to accept that I'll
never be the kid that I once was,
it's hard to accept being just
a number in an infinite line of numbers

Reviews

[Emily B]

oh, oh, this is great. . . I can relate all too well. Hang on to those late nights/early mornings, though, at least sometimes. Don't lose your words. I love the voice in this. So clean, matter of fact, honest. . .

One thing you might look at:
I've been living without, as of lately

I would probably leave out the 'as of'

Great write! Glad to see you around.

[Emel Kay]

I have to admit that this poem is hitting pretty hard because of it's subject matter. I mean, I think all creative people reach the point where they realize that the chances to use the little precious time they have is becoming more and more like slivers instead of chunks. I think that the subject you chose is working out pretty well, and that the way you develop the idea is also well done. My problem comes with the last stanza.

The last stanza seems to be the running thought of the poem, 'I will never be a kid with time to write again', so why do you put it at the end? I know that it's hard in a poem to not write outright the point of the piece, but you do such an outstanding job developing the running thought in the poem that the reader doesn't need the last stanza to tell them what the poem was about. I think you may want to revise it, just because the rest of the poem is built so solidly that it would be a shame to end it on a weak note.

this is probably one of the strongest pieces of literature I've come across on this website so far, nicely done.

[TL Boehm]

I miss the late night/early morning
creative binges
that felt so full of purpose
resonant and bittersweet words...the price we pay for growing up sometimes doesn't seem worth the outcome...I remember once I wrote eight sets of lyrics in one day. they weren't 'great' but just hte fact that I could because I had time...and few burdens...
this poem brought that back to me. Awesome writing.

[Riverdance]

Aww, but life isn't some little game that you can rush through, and you don't have to suffer.
Everything and everyone changes, and we just have to learn to cope with it and make the best with what we're given!
I can relate to this though...indeed I can.
Hang on to what you've got, dear!
It's those little things we tend to cling too so fiercely for that small little reminder of what once was.

This is a great write!
Great job, Vyden Myria
Emily sent me. =)

~Rd

[Dan Bullock]

Ah but you can still make your own difference in your own world and that's important! Falling into 'day to day' things doesn't mean you have to make yourself suffer, I can understand what you mean from these words, I like it, it's reflective and in a sad way but the advantage is you know where you are, thus, you can change stuff if you want to :) Good luck!

[Robert Luna]

Aww. But we don't have to be just a number. We are and always will be individuals first. I like the thoughts that are conveyed here and having felt this way way to many times in my life. I have a deeper appreciation for this. But the thing that I have learned through my time here in this world. If we realize that we are more than what we are being told that we are, than we have a purpose and if we have a purpose we have possibilities. As long as we hold onto those possibilities we can make a change. The thing is not accepting their rules making our own.