Physical Comedy

John Wheeler championed the modern Standard Theory for 30 years, and the evidence accumulating indicates 42 is as good as it gets.

Physical Comedy!

John Wheeler, was a physicist,

Who once cried out in anguish!
Lamenting the lowbrow state,

Of theoretical physics today,

“A Black Hole, Has No Hair!”

“Gravity…... Without Mass!”

“Time Is Whatever Prevents,”

“Everything from happening at once!”

Space merely exists to Occupy our time!

Forty-two is as good, as any explanation!

Running in circles saves our desperate time!

Globular blobular anisotropic quasicrystals!

Squared circle pie-in-the-face spherical cubes!

Goldilocks told Occam he needed a new razor!

Pyramids Can’t Prevent Razors From Rusting!

Cosmic Rays, Do More Than Scratch Your Itch!

There is no law except the law there is No Law!

Dreams Bereft Reality, Are Everyone’s Fantasy!

Reality Without Dreams is Another Nightmare!

Something from nothing yet remains something!

Nothing from nothing turns out to be something!

Something from nothing remains something else!

None can grasp what’s missing from this picture,

Without a multidimensional multifractal mirror!

Everywhere you go in a singularity, there you are,

Complete with rhinestones and baby Velvet Jesus!

None sees the back of their own head like another,

Intuitive mathematics, requiring physical comedy,

Our Poetry Pets make the Cheshire Cat look tame!

Howling at the moon, like a complete Loonytoons!

Loopy temporal vortexes, all chase their own tails!

Still eternally conjecturing, Monstrous Moonshine!

There’s more in heaven and earth, Horatio, than in all of your meaningless bullshit!

Waxing poetically, using Shakespearean metaphors!

Ugly Ducklings remain eternally astounded to learn!

They have always been the hero of their own dreams!

Whilst falling on your a*s gracefully counts for extra points!

Prompting his long time colleague, Richard Feynman!

To immediately assure, the entire physics community!

“Some say Wheeler has lost his mind in his later years,”

*But,*He’s*Always*Been*That*Way!*

Eventually John Wheeler went on to petition the AAAS,

Despite his personal belief in the collective unconscious,

To remove all research into ESP, from their membership!

For never meeting their own standards, for a real science,

Loudly protesting there was never any proof he was sane!

In over a century, none has ever documented the existence,

Of common sense anywhere in the known Civilized World!

Its a Mad Hatter’s Tea Party falling down any rabbit hole!

Confirming that the insane are already running the asylum!

Author's Note

Part of the controversy over such poetry is that it is a 12,000 year old tribal tradition, that is anathema in modern civilization.