23 Pills

I sit on the bathtub edge

Looking at my cracked reflection.

Shards of mirror lay

Scattered on the floor.

I have already taken a piece

And traced it across my wrists –

To no avail,

The pain still lingers.

My blood has already

Made crimson pools on the tiles,

Creating distorted images of you.

I now hold a bottle

Of sleeping pills in my hand.

I have already consumed a couple -

I lost count after 15.

Isn’t that the amount of pills

It takes to kill yourself?

The amount it takes

To numb the burning pain?

I take another swig

Of the horrid concoction

Of brandy, red wine and death,

And look at the distorted image

The shattered remains of the mirror has created.

Tears run down my cheeks

And glisten in the harsh

White bathroom light.

Then I realise just how many pills

I have actually taken.

23 pills.

One for each year,

Since my first breath,

That I have been forced to suffer through.

One for each year,

Since my first look at the world,

That I have lived wishing I could die.

And with my final drop of blood,

And my final sip of poison,

My vision blurs

And my eyes roll back in my head,

Watching as the harsh white light

Turns to black…

 

Copyright©JosieWentzel16April2008

 

Reviews

[An owl on the moon]

The darkness is so devouring; finishing off all joy, all love, all hope... You have written a masterpiece, filled with pieces of a broken life that is broken no more. With your words you paint pain so vividly it aches my heart to think of anyone so filled with hopelessness. You have the depth of the universe in your soul.

yours,

Craig

[chris' girlfriend]

wow thats my favorite of all of your poems!!!
very deep and emotional.

[Courtney]

Damn girl thats really good i like it so much!! its just like me!

[[untitled]]

This is good. I thought your description was great. The last couple lines were very powerful as the person dies. Very good!