who will notice?

artwork by barb haviland courtesy of etsy.com

off to a restless sleep

my poetry suspended in a teardrop

only to wake clutching a fragment of a dream

the rise and fall of my chest

matches the rhythm of the city

the dull ache in my heart is barely perceptible

like the slow hiss of steam from the pavement

the heated pulse of summer has arrived

yes, i’ll manage to limp over the emotional gaps in my life

but who will notice?

 

Reviews

[Patricia Wedel]

dear Lydi... Who will notice your limp...
Love is always an adventure over the
craggy shores of the ocean's storms.
The beauty of the sunrise will always
bring strength and renewal as seagulls
glide above with the promise of
eternal love. truly, Pat

[Lydia Shutter]

Your reviews are glorious, my friend. Thank you so much. Lydi**

[V. K. Harris]

I noticed and This is a wonderful write full of imagery...

[Lydia Shutter]

Thank you, V.K. Lydi**

[Jimmy Yetts]

Melancholy--nearly, forlorn.
Still, you will, indeed, bounce back, Lydi.
You'll continue to write amazing poetry; showing us how it's best done.
This excellent, emotive bit of work is yet another shining example of your uncommon ability.

[Lydia Shutter]

Frankie, you flatter me so. Thank you for your lovely review. Lydi**

[Diana]

"but who will notice?" - I think everyone has mused about that particular point at one time or another. It's really hitting home for me... I think we all need someone to notice.

Thanks for writing.

[Lydia Shutter]

Yes, we do, Diana. thank you so much for the review. Lydi**

[Texasbay]

This is a beautiful sorrow Lydia . These gaps remain don't they , we have to build
Around them as we go .... Newbie here ... Loving your work . Not quite sure
how the scoring works on this site . Please forgive any errors ... lol . Bay

[Lydia Shutter]

I appreciate your review. The scoring is not as important as the review. Never stress about it. Lydi**

[Lydia Shutter]

Just went to read your work and found your account closed. What has happend?

[redzone]

Well, there are quite a few who would and do notice Lydi. I don't think I could express it any better than KL has... I think we should give you a huge poetic hug. One cause it's in need and two, well, just because... yes you could center this poen in that "tear drop", but it's the totality that strikes deep... so (((((Lydi)))) it's a very sadly nice poem.... ~~redzone

[Lydia Shutter]

I think you WOULD notice, Curt. You seem to be very empathetic...and I so appreciate that. Your comment is more than "nice" and I thank you. Hugs back at ya. Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

you will notice....and that is all that matters...

and your words are so metaphorical here....you always praise my metaphoric ability (which is kind of you)

but you wield words like a saber and they slice through our minds quite aptly.

[Lydia Shutter]

we belong to a mutual admiration society! :) Thank you very much, Jacob....going to sharpen my saber now! :) Lydi**

[Tom]

It's during those wee small hours when one lies awake as restful sleep seems like an elusive stranger, we become aware of ourselves, our well-being and sometimes ponder our very own existence and its relevance to the grander scheme of things ?

A sincerely penned, poetic reverie Lydia, we are all human and so have a vulnerable side, but to be able to relay this in such creative words is both absolutely absorbing and highly commendable indeed !

[Lydia Shutter]

I have always been aware of my vulnerability....I believe it is what makes a person human. Thank you so much for the caring review, Tom. Hope things are going well in your world. Lydi**

[Tom]

Yes indeed Lydia, btw changed that illusive to elusive, I know you are much to polite to point out my little spelling gaffs.

[Lydia Shutter]

As long as I knew what you meant, why bother? :)

[Tom]

Thank you Lydia

[Teresa Powell]

Some of us don't even realize that were just limping over emotional gaps in life until later in life... I love the way you bring your poems to life.

[Lydia Shutter]

Thank you so much, Teresa. Lydi**