Shirley

Shirley girl it’s been a thrill
Let me introduce you to Bill
He has a dog called Jet
He’s a solid bet
You’re dumping me after an hour
One hour
Sixty minutes of bliss
How you reminisced
Your ex-Ted
Shot himself in the head
Mother Jill
Lying at the bottom of the hill
Father John
Somewhere in the Amazon
Grandad Cain
Threw himself under a train
Granny Flo
Where did she go
Not forgetting brother Fred
Lost, presumed dead
Then you mention your lesbian lover Di
Who right away I’m thinking 
How did she die
Not realising, you must be Bi
Then just as I’m getting my head around that
You mention the cat
Is there a dog
What about the fog
Oh, that’s what caused the bus to disappear into the bog
You saved the lollypop man Jack
Well, that’s a blessing
What
Died next day, heart attack
Shirley girl
Don’t think of me as a bit of a moaner
But Jesus girl
You're a bloody Jonah.

Reviews

[Lyn Anderson]

For some reason this reminds me of my gramma, who used to read me the obits.

[Paul Bell]

Knew there wasn't just one.

[Katarina T.]

Well written, funny, and the rhyming is brilliant! A really pleasant poem to read while still appreciating the the ideas

[Paul Bell]

She's a legend.

[Annette Pisano-Higley]

I think Shirley was pulling your leg all that time Paul! What a crazy, clever, bouncing and rhyming litany of tragic characters she has doomed! Like successive derelict dominoes, they all fell under her spell. A wonderful, whimsical poem you’ve written here. This is one woman you need to keep at arm’s, and foot’s, distance my friend-ha! So funny!

[Paul Bell]

Getting married to her next week. lol

[barleygirl]

Since I've been sketchy for a couple months lately, I return pleased to find Carol Cashes is back throwing down some reverberating rants around here. I just noticed there's a similarity in the way each of you relish painting a bad scene with imaginative exaggeration for laughs. Kind of a perverted sense of humor that I find irresistible! *wink! wink!* I love that you're dabbling in a bit of rhyming riff too! *smile* Hope your 2019 starts off without a string of mishaps such as your poem describes! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Paul Bell]

Nice to see Carol back, was going to propose to her, but she said the world would end. Maybe give Shirley another chance. lol. Hope 2019 is going well. Why is Trumpy so quiet.

[barleygirl]

40 new liberal women started in congress today . . . women in power scare him *heh! heh! heh!*

[Paul Bell]

See a foreign posting to North Korea for them.

[Mrudula Rani]

Shirley is brilliant! we all know life is neither all good nor all bad. She is using all the mishaps of her life as an excuse to break up... one hour with her is so blissful and that is all you are allowed!!!

[Paul Bell]

It was an experience. lol

[Onlyme]

Oh my, Paul, this was very entertaining, funny and dramatic to say the least.

[Paul Bell]

She's got a good heart. lol