' A murder of crows '

' A murder of crows '

A Poem by Tom
"

Do crows really need to be destroyed so indiscriminately?

"
Bang!
The crack of shotgun, shatters the dawn
thunderous throng, feathers flutter
hapless crow, unceremoniously, falls in gutter

Bang!
There again, this bright summer morn
now a grey pigeon, falls into water
innocent victim of wanton slaughter

Bang!
Another black crow, cutdown forlorn
ever relentless, pull on trigger
ego inflated, enhancing vigour

Bang!
So it continues, on and on
bedraggled birds, dying or dead
because one man, sick in the head!

Bang!
O' Lord, though my soul is torn
I pray, the innocent be spared
and bloodthirsty men, eternally interred!

© 2017 Tom



Author's Note

Tom
Please, be as subjective as you like !

My Review

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Featured Review

This poem is so sad. It reminded me of those ignorant time when royal men and men of blue blood went to hunting parties and brought back the heads of hapless wild beasts as trophies or stood and posed with one foot on the poor carcasses. When will man learn. Poor birds!

Posted 4 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tom

4 Months Ago

Yes Divya, your comparison is exactly my poem's purpose, thank you my ffriend rise!
DIVYA

4 Months Ago

You are welcome Tom. Your writings full of compassion and emotion are so appreciated.



Reviews

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I really enjoyed this poem, one of the better ones I've read on this site I think. Your use of repetition through the word "bang!" is impeccable. Literally, the poem is about a hunter killing a defenseless murder of crows, but the poem made me think of such recent travesties as the Las Vegas shooting and the Sandy Hook tragedy. Whether that was your intention or not, it's a very strong image.
My only suggestion to consider in revision is your punctuation. There are a lot of places that seem like they could use punctuation, but it's missing, particularly at the end of your lines.
Good work, I hope this review is helpful!

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tom

1 Month Ago

Yes, a very thorough and exemplary examination and what's more, you're in sync with my thoughts, tho.. read more
what an amazing write...keep up!

Posted 3 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tom

3 Months Ago

Thank you Apoorve!
I echo your sentiments. You have written a very visually vivid piece. I hate to see animals (and birds) suffer or get abused. I wonder what on earth goes on in the head of those 'bloodthirsty' men. A sense of power, I suppose. Or perhaps, just ignorance.

Posted 3 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tom

3 Months Ago

Both l think Aunt Astri, thank you my friend for your visit and sage like thoughts !
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Your words remind me of how man has to be superior over fowl of the air, animals of the land, fish of the sea, and too often of others of our species. Man is the highest form of life (that we are aware of), and we are able to annihilate the weaker with our show of power; our weapons, our wealth, our ability to conquer.

The lowly crow, though often a major problem for farmers (and for the cherry tree that was picked clean in a matter of what seemed to be minutes by hungry crows), is part of God's plan, a needed part of life.

You have presented your message with clarity, especially with the repetition of the "Bang!".

Yes, may the innocent be spared from those whose goal in life is to rule by power and might! May we be respectful of that which has been given to us by taking only what is needed, not useless slaughter of creatures including the crow! And may we remember our proper station in life!

Posted 4 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tom

4 Months Ago

Yes indeed so my dear friend, tolerance and respect is all I'm trying to get across, and as always y.. read more
Sheila Kline

3 Months Ago

It is my pleasure to review your poems that always have a another message tucked within your words! .. read more
A very visual poem i must say...like how you used the sound so effectively!

Posted 4 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tom

4 Months Ago

Thank you Moon's fairest, your words are appreciated!
This poem is so sad. It reminded me of those ignorant time when royal men and men of blue blood went to hunting parties and brought back the heads of hapless wild beasts as trophies or stood and posed with one foot on the poor carcasses. When will man learn. Poor birds!

Posted 4 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tom

4 Months Ago

Yes Divya, your comparison is exactly my poem's purpose, thank you my ffriend rise!
DIVYA

4 Months Ago

You are welcome Tom. Your writings full of compassion and emotion are so appreciated.
In a fit of pique I dare say if i'd been armed, I'd have shot the magpies that raided the little starlings nest in my eves but then I know I couldn't have. I cried for two days once when a fledgling i found wouldn't eat despite being abandoned by mum.
Your title and the layout is very apt - systematic slaying. Good job.

Posted 4 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tom

4 Months Ago

Thanks again Tony for your visit and perceptive review!
Very resplendently written the pain of birds. Thanks for writing

Posted 4 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tom

4 Months Ago

Thank you again good Sir for your welcome visit!
I personally lean into the Native American way of thinking, that you only kill for that which you need, the cycle of life giving life as God intended. To kill without need for the sake of senseless hate and greed makes absolutely no sense to me. I have crows in my treetops and in my yard every day. I can't imagine killing them. While their "Caw! Caw!" can be a bit annoying at times, I wouldn't take that away for anything. They are actually quite fascinating to watch. I love the communion that they share, how I can throw pieces of bread across the yard and one will see it and call for the others to come. I love to watch as they strut across the yard, reminding me of a priest dressed in black with his hands clasped behind his back as he walks deep in thought. I love how, when seeing food, they will move with stealth, slowly approaching, then place a foot on the food, holding it down, and then packing and pulling, perhaps to gather and fly away. How the sun shines a sheen upon their black feathers is always so enthralling. They really are a fascinating lot to watch. It's a shame to think of someone doing this to anyone to anything.

Posted 4 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tom

4 Months Ago

Thank you Linda for your judicious review of my poem, and indeed, crows are fascinating to watch, ei.. read more
Capital punishment may be banned, but killing to protect can always be submitted as a " legitimate" justification. Culling, fox hunting and war are prime examples - but in the end there is never a positive, lasting result.

Posted 4 Months Ago


Tom

4 Months Ago

Yes indeed Norman, it's an unpleasant and distasteful business in whatever guise or excuse and thank.. read more

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Added on June 11, 2017
Last Updated on September 16, 2017

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Tom
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