the unforever

just comes over me now and again

A sunny day,
brilliant!
not a care in the sky ...
I feel your blue,
hot, and oppressive,
bearing down on me.
a clouded memory,
but there is no rain.
we know we cannot
turn back those hands
but still, we try.
we beat those last
conversations
to an unrecognizable pulp.
we beg and we scream
to an unfair deity,
an empty shell of a world.
your light feels stolen,
even though
you are the only thief,
and all you left us
was grief.

Author's Note

Reviews

[barleygirl]

I love the title . . . I can feel the lasting damage that wreaks havoc in one's heart. I have to push away such bitterness on a regular basis, especially where my family is concerned. I think it's more successful for me to fill up the space with fun observations, rather than trying to push away the unconquerable ones. I've found that what we fight is what stays in our minds most. Just a thought . . . good luck wrangling these blue feelings of unforever.

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you, yes. In my own way I have made these attempts -- poems and odes to the better memories -- usually, these feelings come and go with important seasons, and dates, triggered by random things, sights and music, etc ... I agree, but that is what makes suicide such a devastating enemy. It is the unanswered Why -- I think the song sums it up beautifully.

[barleygirl]

No matter how well I master focusing on the positive, there's always this underlying layer of poisonous feelings I wish I could eradicate forever! *sigh!*

[Lorry]

What a simple title, but such an impact. The unforever, because forever is a word too cheaply said by some The reverberations of those clouded memories still catch us unexpectedly at times, with those unexpected visits to our mind. Beautifully captured.

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you. I thought the same of the song. Why?

[Ana Papaya]

It's not something can become undone.
What do they say? is it 'permanent solution to a temporary problem'
The wave that hits in the moment sometimes pushes people to do something that they don't really want to do if they let the storm settle.

[Lyn Anderson]

So true, my friend. There should be a way we could all look at the fallout prior to making such a decision. But still, one friend lived through the consequences of his brother's suicide, knew the pain, and chose to do it anyway ... I guess, in that instant, it's all about you.

[Ana Papaya]

Yes, it is. Whether it's suicide, abuse, harsh words, you cannot turn back the clock. I think this piece is very meaningful on so many levels. We really just need to pause and breathe before we speak and act.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, it feels much worse for those left behind....one might escape this life with suicide...and then is gone...but those left behind suffer through the memories...just never forget and the pain stays with us, forever.

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you for taking the time :)

[Ted Kniffen]

I can feel the anger and hurt in this poem. Very well done.

Ted

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you. You sum it up nicely. Suicide is the gift you can't take back, and keeps on giving.