Playing With Dolls

For fans of He-Man action figures

 

I have a hobby, where I have conversations in my mind, through which I can examine my anxieties and play out scenarios, looking for solutions and forming opinions, like a little kid playing with his toys:

 

He-Man's Army vs. the evil alliance of GI-Joe and Barbie the Amazon Queen, because she’s so much bigger. Watching this small boy, as He-Man is continuously repulsed by the hordes of Barbi's Dream House, as Fisto is getting his head ground away by the smoking wheel of the stationary bicycle, and it seems Skeletor is going to get the last laugh… but wait.... something’s changed... You see a boost in the kid's demeanor, a surge of enthusiasm, as he reaches some emotion that needs no rationality. 

The good guys are supposed to win!!

Suddenly there’s a terrible earthquake and the dream house smashes against the wall, forever destroyed, and to hell with my sister. As He-Man approaches the wreckage, he finds GI-Joe, his legs severed and unarmed except for one grenade; which hits He-Man in the chest, blasting the unstoppable man-beast across the room. While he's lying there unconscious, that sadistic b***h Barbie, with one leg bent the wrong way at the knee, and her clothes hanging to expose those lush nippleless breasts, grabs the unattended Sword of Greyscull and staggers toward the fallen hero. Is this the end? Wait! What’s that!?!...  Why its Fisto's right arm, with its steel fist, the only signifying piece remaining from his earlier dismemberment. It seems possessed by the spirit of all things that this little boy thinks to be good and right. This gauntlet of righteousness smashes Barbie in the face, resulting in the boy ripping her apart, socket joints popping away from the abdomen, as he raises his hands, allowing the pieces to fall through his fingers, past his maniacal face to some forgotten pile on the floor.

Later that day the boy's dog died, having choked on one of Barbi's legs. The boy never could shake that memory of Gusto, his Chihuahua, whom he’d named after that feeling he gets when he knows he is going to live forever, lying there on his back, dead eyes staring at the ceiling fan, legs sticking up, with a demented fifth leg sticking out of his mouth.

Reviews

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Tragic and yet a bit of irony mixed in with demented imagination of a child. I should know. In my youth my G.I Joe would often make trips to my cousin's barbie doll house to play doctor, or in Joe's devious mind army medic. She would often get mad finding her barbie doll completely nude in compromising positions no 12 yr old should know. This was a good story though I wish it would have had more detail. Like where the hell was Ken doll during all this carnage.

[mattavelli]

Thanks for reading, Carlos! :)

[barleygirl]

Lots of bizarre imaginative writing going on in the spirit of Halloween lately & this piece definitely hums with originality amongst the best. You mention details I didn't realize I absorbed fifty years ago (Barbie doesn't have n*****s! . . . why hasn't anyone noted that before?) I'm not crazy about your run-on sentence style of blathering this all out in one huge glop with no pauses to take in the plethora of details and thereby giving us sporadic moments of anticipation (timing is important for spooky or outrageous tales) . . . but I definitely admire your ability to dig deep & find the most outrageous s**t you can find in there, then spill it on the paper like the normal things all grown-up man-kids do.

[mattavelli]

Thank you for the feedback, Barleygirl! :)
Barbie's lack kept this pg-13.

[Shannon]

OK, complete left turn there. I read that violence has unintended consequences. The preface is particularly interesting to me. Makes me curious what you were working out.

[mattavelli]

It's just supposed to be fun. :)
I was a destructive child. Haha

[Shannon]

So I read too deep? Lol. It was very entertaining.

[Ellay]

Wow, this was truly an adventure packed into a story. Loved it :D

[mattavelli]

Thanks for reading, Pepitro.

[ANTO]

I hope Gusto's story isnt a true one Matt - if it is my condolences.
The write itself is so left field its positively genius. The title is the bamboo and leaves over this mind-trap and once in the pit the reader has no choice but to read on, MacDuff.
"Barbie, with one leg bent the wrong way at the knee, and her clothes hanging to expose those lush nippleless breasts, grabs the unattended Sword of Greyskull and staggers toward the fallen hero."
Such detail - really fires the imagery banks.
Avante garde comes to mind. Kudos Matt. :))

[mattavelli]

I never had a chihuahua. I kept pet turtles.
Thanks for reading. Blame your own avatar for the read request. Haha

[Roland Petrov]

How can one not love a story about superheroes that ends up with a Chihuahua choking to death on Barbie's leg?

[mattavelli]

Thanks, Roland. :)

[Unpeeled_Banana]

This is wonderful. Fast-pace, eye-catching and hilarious. It is so relative as well. The ending... what a shocker!

[mattavelli]

thank you, Ms. Banana. i was a destructive child. haha

[A sea person]

Very interesting write...

Unfortunately, this cannot be considered for the Support our Support contest. Thank you for taking the time to submit, and I hope you continue to grow in you writing capabilities!

v.r.
Ryan

[Marie]

Nice. What's with the blue line?