A Prisoner's pain!

A Prisoner's pain!

A Poem by Simple_mee
"

Once watched a heart-breaking documentary on the lives of prisoners at Guantanamo bay. This one is inspired from there...

"

 

 

There is gloom around the place,

I am enclosed in a blaze,

The four walls are torturing me wild,

The darkness has made me blind!

The thoughts in my head have formed a maze,

The outer world is already a daze!

Nights and days have no distinction,

I so ferventely wish for extinction!

The agony has broken me down,

Every moment I feel chased by ferocious hounds!

The air is stale and the floor wet,

Life and love have long left!

The heart feels like a pumping organ,

My only wish is for a little dormer!

To save my soul from this violent pain,

I am ever ready for any trade!

 

 


© 2010 Simple_mee



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Reviews

Your writing brings alive the painfulness experienced my so many locked off from society.. from hope.. Powerfully written!

Posted 7 Years Ago


excellent job!!! a very deep piece.... alot of your pieces are filled with different emotions... very well expressed..nice work!!

Posted 7 Years Ago


Life is prison is tough and i have seen in movies though haven't seen in real... and your poem is so powerful exposing the pain.. nice poem...

Posted 7 Years Ago


agonizing! seriously, i'm picturing the ones who ate jailed even though they are innocent and are convicted with any crime! they are brutally treated! and their life becomes like a soul less body!

Posted 7 Years Ago


I can only imagine what it must be like in those cells.. You're locked up in a box with no hope.. Guantanamo is said to be one of the worst places in the world.. I think torture and punishment are two different things.. Doing time after doing something is different from being innocent yet being treated badly..

Posted 7 Years Ago


This reminds me really of the torture that the inmates of Guantanamo bay and similar jails, have to face every moment! It so animal-like that I sometimes ask myself are we still humans!!!

Really wonderful write dear! And it also resembles the feelings of such a poor and tortured guy, who cannot express in big words but in such small lines.

Just a suggestion : Try making the last line to rhyme with the one before. All other lines are rhyming so well, that is why I am saying so...

Posted 7 Years Ago


Being lock up and without hope. Would be a bad place to be in. Your description was very good. I don't know the cure would be. We all need hope and purpose. A powerful poem.
Coyote

Posted 7 Years Ago


very nice....i can see you were inspired! This was one hell of a write!

May i make a suggestion though ? .. .try using different rhyming schemes. dab with many till you find you like.

Posted 7 Years Ago


its great 2 see that u r penning down your thoughts on such different topics so vividly and incredibly... keep it up!

Posted 7 Years Ago


Nice imagery...puts you in a sense of reality of the situation. That's what I love about good poetry, like this, if it's done right, it's like an acid trip...you just see all these images floatin around like they're real, I love it.

Posted 7 Years Ago



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Added on February 21, 2010
Last Updated on February 21, 2010
Tags: Captives thoughts, prisoners pain, captive

Author

Simple_mee
Simple_mee

India



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