Rainy Night in Georgia

Color me gray

as the sky fades to black

color me sad

on this cold rainy night

Rainy night in georgia

takes a toll,

as the rain

falls on my soul

I miss you sweet heart

i need you to hold

i need you to touch me baby

touch my soul

I guess 

i should have never let you go

now i feel you sweet heart

deep down in my soul

You see 

true love never dies

and as i stand here in the rain

my heart still cries ...

Reviews

[GreenShoes]

A lovely poem indeed.

A couple suggestions?
All your stanzas have an ABCB rhyme scheme except for the first one. You might want to change the last line in that 1st stanza to something like, "I want my sweetheart back"

Also, I know spelling doesn't count in poetry, in fact, you can even make up your own words, but the last word on the last line should be cries.

[wordman]

thank you karen,lol,learn something every day..never heard of a scale,but it sounds nice
i am a total ameatur

[Jesus & Gypsy Soul]

Great critiquing. I need to learn these scales too.

[wordman]

just let it come from the heart,break the rules

[Karmee]

A very awesome well written write, loved your last stanza

[wordman]

you give great reviews,i owe you three

[William Liston]

This was a sad piece ... I didn't expect that. Based on the title, I just thought this was going to be about a "Rainy Night in Georgia" -- nothing more.

There are some typos in this piece. I notice that some of the i's are not capitalized.

- William Liston

[wordman]

thank you william,appreciate your review

[Alice Poésy]

Nothing like the rain to remind us of our weeping hearts and that we're longing for that someone we should never have said goodbye to. Indeed it takes a toll on the soul.

A delight to read.

[wordman]

thank you alica for the visit!

[RomaJ]

The rain hides tears of a tender heart. So meaningful. The soul yearns. It hopes - For a love that could've been. As it sings; Its sweet and soulful ballad to the dark Georgia rain. A very lovely and emotive piece.

[wordman]

thank you !

[Farmgirl]

Awwww I love this Ron !

You are quite the romantic it seems :)


I'm a suckered for romantic writing .

I will be returning to read!

[wordman]

my door is always open,the lights are dim,the music is playing soft and slow

[SZHZIA]

What a beautiful poem! the rhymes and simple choice of words are inspirational. Simply loving it, Thanks for sharing! :-)

Best
Szhzia

[wordman]

thank you for the visit

[SZHZIA]

My pleasure and you are welcome... :-)

[barleygirl]

I like this song & you've taken it in a direction that doesn't feel like a repeat of the lyrics, but your own creation of what a rainy night in Georgia might feel like. Your haunting refrains feel like song lyrics & I can feel the loneliness & regret brimming over your words. I'm OK with irregular rhymes, especially prevalent in lyrics, so I think the reading "sounds" fine.

[wordman]

thank you very much,if i had any training i would be terrible i`m sure ! not that i am any good at it
but it just comes natural the way i write

[Tomás Ó C..]

We regret... we regret... that we will regret we never see at the time...

[wordman]

you areright my friend,thanks

[Chinny Barney]

Beautifully written Wordman.l love the first stanza,depicting a tone of sadness and regret.This love feeling is a powerful force that gets pencils and pens scribbling thoughts on paper.

I think the should be some thoughts following after the last,one that pleads for a return of your love.

Keep being inspired....chinny barney

[wordman]

thank you for reading !