A Tale of Fairy

I love fantasy. I always think these sort of things in my mind. So this is a small description of one of my fantasy.

Castle of blue which will be made of thick glass,

Strong like ancient rock where nothing can clash.

The charm of your face will be worth watching, I suppose

When you will see our big garden with every color of rose.

The “Dove’s Waterfall” will be nature’s Jacuzzi,

Who has two daughters; swan princesses.

You will enjoy their company,

Whenever you want to be refreshed.

 

Royal will be the Celebration and all people will sing

When I propose with the diamond moon on your ring

Spring will come and joy it will bring

Queen will be you and I’ll be the King.

 

Historical will be our reign,

As you will be the defense of me.

I will be the symbol of strength,

Where you will be the symbol of peace.

 

And then one day dark clouds will gulp our kingdom;

As the devil will come.

Don’t be afraid at that time,

As your king will never let you down.

If I will come back victorious then we will celebrate,

And if not, O’ my Queen! Don’t cry...

As my soul will always be there to protect you..

 

This will be real as nothing in this is imaginary,

No one has such power to bury emotions extraordinary.

I know! This may not be considered epistolary.

Because this is never meant to be a story.

This is “A Tale of Fairy”

Author's Note

I hope you can fantasize what I had done. Feel free to share whatever comes in your heart after reading this. I will welcome any suggestion for improvisation or detection of any mistake if I made. Thank you :)

Reviews

[Jack Necron (Aubrey Jac..]

A fantasy with a classical and enchanting vibe. I like how this is a mix between a fairytale and a sort of promise of how a couple's relationship could be. The second and final stanzas are excellent and the descriptions throughout this poem are well done.

The only thing I noticed is in the fourth stanza, "dark cloud" could be "dark clouds" or "a dark cloud" to make it fit better. Thank you for sharing!

[Ashish]

Thank you for the correction Jack , I will rectify it immediately :)

[Jack Necron (Aubrey Jack Peaslee)]

No prob and you're welcome! It's a good poem.

[Asya Kardzhaliyska]

There was a really nice sense of urgency towards the latter half of the poem, and that really came through. However, if I could offer a suggestion: the line where you say, "the charm of your face will be worth watching, I suppose", I'd remove the 'I suppose' because it makes the narrator sound uncertain, and it kind of ruins the flow of the rest of the stanza, but other than that, I thought it was very enjoyable!

[Silmara McGarry]

I could fantasized perfectly... Wonderful poem in a touchingly described story. So great to read.

As you will be the defense of me. (Superb)

Well done from me!
Sil
:-)

[Ashish]

Thank u :)

[Zoya]

I like to read your fantasy poems. They always have a meaning and an emotion behind it unlike many other poems that I have read on writerscafe so far...and I really love the way how you make them rhyme. Well written!

[Ashish]

Thank you Zoe :)
Even I like the poems who are in rhyming nature..

I am glad that you found it different & filled with feelings.

Thanks again.

[Zoya]

Mention not :)

[DIVYA]

A lovely tale with great flair and style. I love the grand images your words conjure in the reader's mind. Fantasy may be far from reality but it does shape reality in many ways. Keep up the good work Ashish!

[Ashish]

Thank you for reading this piece and review :)

[DIVYA]

You are welcome :)

[Michael X]

Wow, epic flow and feeling, this is romantic, as in pure poetry full of loving imagery and endearing emotion. Great, worthwhile read!

[Ashish]

Thank you so much :)

[wordman]

a beautiful poem of love,a fairytale

[Ashish]

Thank you sir :)

[sharmila]

omg your poem is like a story and i can just keep on reading it it never seems to get bored you're really gifted with talent.

[Ashish]

It's a Tale of Fairy *wink* *wink*
Thank you for reading and reviewing this :)

[sharmila]

no problem it's no bigggie reading it was my pleasure

[Manisha]

Powerful and beautiful.
Keep writing and inspiring!

[Ashish]

Aww.. Thank you so much :)

[barleygirl]

I like your fantasy. You may not have been seeing it this way, but this is also called "allegorical" writing, which is using a metaphor that continues thru the entire story & it can represent something else. Like you pretending to be a king represents wanting to be the #1 person in another person's life. Also, if the kingdom perishes, you are showing us that it can be a good thing, whether it comes back or doesn't . . . this can represent the way love can last, even if two people don't stay together. Your story works well in the fantasy way that you told it. But it also has good symbolism for any kind of relationship in any era of life. Th

A few corrections that might help:
2nd line: delete "an"
4th line: delete "will"
4th line (this is an optional idea) . . .
instead of: "which will be full of red rose"
"with every color of rose"
8th line: "fresh" could be "refreshed"

2nd stanza/2nd line:
"When I will propose you with the moon like diamond ring"
could be: "When I propose with the diamond moon on your ring"

4th stanza/last line:
"there for you, to protect"
could be: "be there to protect you"

Last stanza/2nd line:
delete: "the" and "as it is"

I hope I didn't over-do it with the suggestions!
Thanks for considering possible corrections!

[Ashish]

Thank you so much for rectifying me. I had corrected.

"Allegorical" that's something new for me though I didn't thought that when I was writing. Woww...
:)

[barleygirl]

This really sounds good now, with the rhythm & rhyme. Thank you for trusting my suggestions (((HUGS)))