What it's like being me

This is something else I wrote about my disabilities. These are just some of my struggles.

One thing people don't realize about having autism is that we ARE very intelligent. The only thing that makes it harder for us is how our brains are wired. There is no autistic person who is alike yet most of us can tell you the same things about what being autistic is like.

The hardest part for me with autism is being misunderstood. A lot of times people don't understand how bad my anxiety really is. They see someone who can communicate just like anyone else and don't realize that even people like me still struggle the same as a severely autistic person.

Communication isn't hard for me to use and to tell someone what my needs might be. The thing that is the most difficult for me is social interaction and verbal expression. That's why I like expressing myself better when I write.

People can't accept the fact that someone like me with autism plus intellectual delays can write so well. They treat me as if I am TOO intelligent and then get the idea that I don't need help.

I do need help. I need help doing things so that I can get into the habit of doing them. The hardest part for me is being out of routine and people are always finding it harder to understand just how bad my autism and anxiety actually is.

When they hear that I have mild autism they think it's no big deal. It is a big deal for me because I don't think my autism is mild at all. It depends on the environmental stress or the things that are happening to me.

If I have too much I need to process then that's when the anxiety and the panic start erupting. Not very many people realize how much I struggle every day. When I act out, I get yelled at for bad behavior but there are so many times when being yelled at or punished always makes it worse.

People with autism have a harder time dealing with any kind of punishment. The reason is most of the time, we do something and we don't realize how bad it is to do that. It's like we have no control over what we deal with.

Author's Note

Please note again that this came from my iPad. I use my iPad a lot for expression in writing. So be aware of any typos and I will fix them later. Also, this is a subject I am touchy about. I don't like people comparing my writing to my intelligence.

Reviews

[Lady Cardinal]

I cannot relate to having autism but after reading this I can really empathize with you. I would never judge someone of their intelligence by their disabilities. I don't understand why someone would do that. To be honest, I think you write better than me!

I think it's a great thing that you have written this down so people can get a better understanding of someone with autism feels and what it's like through their eyes.

Keep writing on friend!