HER

Hello my past. There you are. What should I put in this diary? How about the day I met the person that changed my life forever.
~FLASHBACK~
"Kyra! Come over here right now." Sophia was waving at me. Jeez why can't she see I was getting lunch. Now I have to wait. "Hey Sophie! What are you doing?" I said. She gave me such a look like I was telling the school her biggest secret. "Hush. Kyra did you meet the new girl? I am hearing rumors that she's weird and her mother has never let her into the public until now. Ain't that weird? She has to be a freak. No wonder she wears a big bulky black jacket in the hot summer weather." The new girl came from Alaska so she isn't accustomed to Florida and the weather but these rumors need to end. "Sophia. These rumors are ridiculous and for you to believe them is disgusting of you. They have no meaning and she is very nice. I have three classes with her." Sophia believes rumors all the time and sometimes we get into the worst fights that we won't talk for days. " Krya, when someone says a person is weird it could be true. Anyway people say that they seen her do things that normal people don't do. Strange things." Now here is the fight that will begin and won't end until she finally agrees with me. "Sophie! I can't believe you! We don't even know her yet! We only have afternoon classes with her. You can't judge her like that." She needs to seriously lay off of the drama. " Hello.. May I sit here? No one else wants me to sit with them. They look at me weirdly and move somewhere else or just yell weirdo at me." Oh gosh. It's the new girl. "It's her Krya. Do we let her sit here?" Sophie whispered to me. "Hi! My name is Krya. This is Sophia. And you may sit here."

~ That was the first time we seen her. She seemed nice and normal as any normal teenager would. Sophie and I befriended her quickly. Now here is the moment when we found out for ourselves that she is not what we thought she was...~

… "Kyra! We should invite Ashley to the sleep over we are having tonight. We would have so much fun!" Ashley is the name of the new girl. "Okay Sophie. But do not start staring at her waiting for something weird to happen. She is one hundred percent normal." Sophie may have became Ashley' s friend but it doesn't mean she won't stop listening into the gossip. "Kyra, I wouldn't do such a thing! Jeez, I'm not that mean and empty hearted. Go call Ashley!" Now I have to call Ashley. I hope she can come. …"Hey Ashley. Sophie and I were wondering if you want to have a sleepover tonight with us. It'll be so much fun." "I don't know Kyra. I kind of have things to do. Plus I need to do my chemistry homework if I want to get an A." "Please Ashley?! You can do your homework tomorrow when you get home." "Okay Kyra. I will be there at 8."...Sophie was hysterical with joy. She was so antsy throughout the whole day. "Now Sophie, we need to pick out some movies and buy snacks and drinks before Ashley gets here."
11@ night
"Ashley? Are you okay? You don't look so good." She looks so pale as if she saw a ghost. "I am okay Kyra. I just need some fresh air." Of course Sophie fell asleep during the second movie of the Harry Potter series. So when Ashley went outside I went into the bathroom to brush the popcorn kernels out of my teeth. "Boom! CRACK! CLANG!" All of a sudden the power went out and lightening was seen in the window. I ran into my bedroom to see if Sophie was okay. "Sophie? Was that you?" She was still sound asleep on the floor. I am dumbfounded because the sounds were so loud. It was like she was intoxicated with drugs and that's why she is still asleep. I better go see if Ashley is okay since I saw lightening. "Ashley? Are you okay?" Oh my gosh. There is blood trailing through the kitchen to the back door. I ran outside thinking Ashley had gotten injured. "Ashley? Where are you?" There is a big hole in the ground. Inside there is lava rumbling like it is ready to erupt any moment. "Kyra, you shouldn't of invited me here. Our friendship was so superficial. I can't believe you didn't feel that vibe. I guess you are that dense even though people see you as smart. Kyra, I am not the person you swore I was. I am what you couldn't imagine in a million years. Your worst nightmare came tonight to show you the real horrors which will of course be death and be in internal hell." I was blank and wasn't sure of what to say or do. "Ashley? What's going on? Why are you doing this to me? All I was was nice to you." "Poor poor Kyra. Didn't mommy ever tell you not to mess with the underground creatures that can swift you away and let you suffocate in your own blood?" She grabbed my arm and started yanking me in. "Get your filthy hands off of my best friend." Sophie! "Oh you came to join the party. Watch your little friend die before your eyes." Ashley is still dragging me in. "Let her go Ashley! Don't do this. I know who exactly you are." "Oh do you pretty cheeks? Because I beg to differ." Sophia is in for it. "I have been studying you for weeks since you came into our school. Don't think I wasn't. Kyra was saying you were so nice and normal but I knew you were different."
All of a sudden I see Sophia throwing some poison or something of the sort at Ashley. She immediately let go of me and I was able to run to Sophia. Ashley started to walks towards us but was being pulled into the hole. "Don't think I am done with you humans! I will be back. You won't ever see it coming either." Then in an instant she was gone and the hole disappeared. "Kyra! Are you okay? Did she hurt you?" I just realized I hadn't said a word since Ashley let go of me. "Yea I'm okay. I need to lay down for awhile. I wish this was all just a big whole bad dream." I hope that thing won't come back like it said. "Lets get back inside and eat something." "Okay Sophie"

~PRESENT~

I still have the event of that night engraved in my head. I wish I could forget it. But I keep dreaming of it every night as if to remind me of the event. That happened five years ago. But you never know when Ashley will be back again.

Author's Note

This is the first time I ever wrote a short story so please, I need loads of comments to help better myself.

Reviews

[Haseo]

Very good writing, need some improvements but in general very good
the way you closed the story (in my opinion) wasn't very good, you should add more intense to it Like (that night is still engraved deep inside my head. I keep living that night everyday in my dreams, all over, as if Ashely will eventually gets me).... Something like that

[Lauren_The_Awesome]

Okay. Thank you. I'm trying to improve my story writing since I'm a beginner in that kind of writing. Thanks for the review I will edit soon to make it better. :)

[The Nude Writer]

Yes! A very good edit :) It is a lot more clear, easy to follow, and I love it's more detailed than before :) You're quite the writer :)

[Lauren_The_Awesome]

Thank you very much! :)

[The Nude Writer]

My pleasure

[The Nude Writer]

I love the story. Maybe stretch it out a bit. There is so much action in such little space. You probably have like 6-7 pages of information here :) Set the scene. What are they doing? Do they try to talk to her more? Stuff like that :) Also a few spelling and grammar mistakes. Mainly "whole" instead of "hole". Hehe. But, again, I love the story :)

[Lauren_The_Awesome]

Thank you so much. I will try to edit it it sometime in the near future. :) I'll request for you to read it again when I'm finished.

[The Nude Writer]

Yay! I can't wait :)

[The Nude Writer]

On first read I love it! I'm going to come back when I have a clear head and see if I can really break it down since you are looking for reviews :)

[Lauren_The_Awesome]

Thank you very much! I wasn't so sure of this short story but your review made me feel like I can do this. :)

[The Nude Writer]

You can you can! :)

[Lauren_The_Awesome]

Thank you!