Hollywood Boulevard

'I don't relate to you, no, cause I'd never treat me this s****y, you make me hate this city'.- Billie Eilish

They buried you up

Threw the dirt over your grave

With poison in my eyes I have the final wave

Now you're finally free

Up in the bristlecone trees, watching everyone but me

I guess that's okay

I think I've gotten over it

Someone else loves me more anyway

The caterpillar hatched in my stomach

The view of Disneyland and a brown mountain

I'll make this city my b***h

I'll make this city my own

Cause you were never there

You were never home

Go live out your blameless dream in Colorado

So get off the internet

And leave the trail of broken-hearted fans alone

He's not Superman or a misunderstood renegade

It was far too fucked up and kept me of the stage

Was I just a locust in you ear, dear?

An iceberg in your path

Sickened in your work day

Cause you were a light in my life

And I paid

I always fought even if victory was strictly ours

And never mine

No, victory was never mine

I'm sick of defending you

It's something I just can't do

Not anymore

It's like I'm just watching you f*****g fall apart

You should've known you'd be held down

Held accountable from the start

I wrote for you

I stood up for you

But it's something I can no longer do

It's messing with my self-esteem and morals

You were once so adorable

Now something horrible and rotten

A self-righteous boar on a getaway

Driving out of Cali highways

So many people hate LA

Only because it's such a beautiful place to have a heartbreak

Tired of your year old trends

Shenanigans

And all your rich friends

Saying the ghosts are surrounding you, again and again

You wanna be haunted?
Fine, I'll f*****g haunt you

You never cared for the scars that faded

But you love the bullshit Twitter games your playing

And for some reason, I knew

To throw the lighter in the gasoline pool

You always thought you were so f*****g cool

So you finally did it

You're the lonesome shattered star on the Hollywood Boulevard

For the sick s**t you did

Did you ever get this far?

Did you smile when you broke those hearts?

I missed you so much one day

I didn't even realize it was your birthday

So, happy birthday, love

I hope you keep doing what you always did

(No, don't keep making disgusting 'jokes')

Treasuring the cheapest, flashiest gift

And sending back the ones that loved you the most.

Author's Note

So, my poetry usually has a steady stream of plot, sort of, connected to my stories but I like leaving them loose enough so people can relate to them and don't have to read the story to get it. This poem could be dedicated to anyone who's had a role model or a celebrity, just someone they look up to turn out to be a shitty person- it sucks and it sucks to let go of it, too. But let them wallow in their own sadness! Let's just create art out of anything and everything. Have a wonderful day! (Also, I used a line from a song that inspired me to finish this piece- I used to despise Billie Eilish because she was 'weird'. But damn, her new song is so, so good, and who the hell am I to judge? Time to listen to the rest of her music! Lol)

Reviews

[Cyprian Van Dyke]

As I was reading this I kept thinking that you were mad when you wrote it, but I didn’t want it to stop because I was enjoying it so much. You write so good when upset. You started this poem as powerfully as you ended it, if not more. I only look up to writers and only in the way they write, not how they live their lives, unless they stand up for something I believe in. Your poem was so amazing. Tyfs

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Thank you so much! I apologize it took me so long to respond but I’ll be coming to visit your page soon! Thank you again (:

[Cyprian Van Dyke]

No worries. I didn’t post anything you didn't read already. I just wanted to hear you write.

[Vertigo Cat1111]

It’s much, much appreciated. (:

[Vertigo Cat1111]

It’s much, much appreciated. (:

[Betty Hermelee]

Wow, you really idolized this person of some renown….and then got kicked in the rear….I guess it’s best not to put one on a pedestal and then feel the disappointment so deeply… you really gave him a tirade…got it all out of your system aster his demise…best way to get over it….really nice writing, very honest and true to your soul.
Best
B.

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Thank you so much! I appreciate that you read and enjoyed it! Thank you!

[Betty Hermelee]

You’re very welcome😊

[barleygirl]

I enjoyed reading your author note explanation & then reading your poem with this in mind, but I was also drifting over to the idea of how, in our culture, there is much idol-worshipping in general, not just a specific case of it. Even people from other countries idol-worship the rich boundless lives we must be living in America, based on watching the BS glamour news we shovel out to the world. It's all a big pumped-up disappointment in the end (((HUGS)))

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Thank you so much! Yes, there are other ways to think of it and I'm so glad you were able to see it in a new way! Thank you for the review!

[LostSage]

your writing is so f*****g great! I feel free to use bad language with you. I got stabbed in the heart with a poison knife. there was no reason I should have been treated like that....stars and flowers atcha✨💐

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Haha, thank you so much! It makes me so happy you continue to enjoy what I post. Thank you!

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

OMG Colacat count me in on Billie Eilish music listening party. She has this very jazzy soulful voice which is surprising considering how young she is. She sings from a place where she's seen it all yet she clings to a painful hope. She does have a unique style and I would consider her a non conformist. Your poetry has some similar traits as you have a unique style as well. Uncompromisingly truthful and yet a soulful depth to it as well that speaks from the heart. Thank you for sharing your art.

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Yes! Her words are so powerful in that song, I need to look at her other music. I've learned to never judge a book by it's cover or what other people say. Thank you so much for the review!