Devil On My Shoulder/Winters Interlude

Sometimes we go through "Winters" in our lives...

Devil on my Shoulder

A Poem by Colton Warr

You should set her free

Unleash her to this world without you

To you, heartbreak is nothing new 

I beg of you, I plea 

Unshackle her from your chains

What are you trying to prove?

She is something you can afford to lose

I promise, it won't feel like a million pains

Let the winter make you cold 

Pull the trigger, be bold 

You will find a new hand to hold

One whose hair and heart will be gold 

Escape this mirage 

Your emotions a messy collage 

Temptation a bearing barrage 

Give in to me, please 

I can make it a breeze 

Again I say, you should set her free

   *****

Winters Interlude

A Poem by Colton Warr 

My heart burns with your desire

A fireplace melting the night for our love

Your voice sounds of a thousand Angels in a choir

You, my love, I put nothing above

Even though we are apart, I can feel your heat 

Saving me from this brutal winter 

Lay your head on my heartbeat 

Watch how fast I can become a sinner

I can still smell the aroma of your flame 

Blazing out of control 

You are something that cannot be tame

Would you please burn down my soul 

But what if this flame of ours goes out? 

What if the cold returns? 

All of our heat doused 

And what if I see her...

Don't let the winter make you cold 

But what if my eyes go astray? 

And I see her green and gold 

Would she be enough to take me away? 

I would then be graced with a different heat

You cast aside and sold 

You without a heartbeat 

I am warm and you are cold 

Reviews

[Devons]

I wondered at first why these two poems were placed here together but I think they are two sides of the same coin. They could be separate, but they could also be all one, in a sense. Their coupling together works too well though, I think, for them to be completely separated.
I recognise in both pieces something of myself, and when taken together that identification is even stronger. It takes thought and feeling, an objective introspection to observe the complexities of one's own character, and the regretful negatives that arise from experience. In essence, an honest appraisal of the shortcomings of human nature. It's relatively rare, I think, to come across a wisdom and honesty from the male perspective (possibly because it is so often perceived as dislikeable - particularly by women).
I believe the greatest strength in writing is a sense of reality, and seeing things for what they are (there is wisdom in acceptance). But also, being able to do this with meaning and depth poetically reinforces that strength. However imperfectly. I think you achieved that here.

[Colton Warr]

Well thank you very much! I spent many nights trying to decide whether I wanted these two to be two separate pieces or apart of the same one. Ultimately I felt as you do, I thought their coupling worked too well for me not to put them together. I'm happy you were able to see yourself in this piece, I think many of us can relate. I agree that a sense of reality is important in a writers work. I think that offers a certain feeling of relation for the reader and allows them to, for a moment, connect with the writer and the thoughts and emotion that they are conveying. Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed this piece here! Thank you for stopping by and giving it a read!

[pvpd sri harsha]

Life
A Poem by luvs2write
Devil On My Shoulder/Winters Interlude
A Poem by Colton Warr is second...
Afterlives
A Story by Raw is third...

[Colton Warr]

Very cool! Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed this so much and I thank you for placing me at second! Thanks for reading!

[Kelsey Ann]

I really like both of them :) Great job! Would you mind reviewing my new poem "Good Mourning/Good Morning". Thanks.

[Colton Warr]

Thank you so much Kelsey! I appreciate the kind words! I'm glad you enjoyed it! I'll check out your poem, absolutely!

[pvpd sri harsha]

good.i like it.thanks. two poems fine...

[Colton Warr]

Thank you very much! Thanks for stopping by and giving this a read! I'm glad you liked it!

[Mr_M]

A very vivid and strong poem. I will look forward to reading the rest of your work.

[Colton Warr]

Thank you very much! I appreciate the kind words! I would very much appreciate you checking out some other stuff I have done, thank you!

[Tina Kline]

A very powerful poem, full of strong emotion and imagery. Strong voice and passion.
I really enjoyed it.

[Colton Warr]

Thank you very much! I'm glad you enjoyed this one! Thanks for reading!

[Tina Kline]

You are welcome.

[Ana B.]

Absolutely brilliant. Love your style....its just....jar :)

[Colton Warr]

Thank you so much Ana B! Thanks for the kind words! Jar, I love that! Glad you enjoyed!

[Ana B.]

Anytime, i love good poetry and yours is amongst that :)

[child of God]

This is a beautiful write thank you for sharing it was so strong and true a pleasure to read
Broken girl

[Colton Warr]

Thank you Broken Girl! I'm glad you liked this piece! Thanks for stopping by and giving this a read!

[William Arthur]

A strong and honest poem, letting go is the bravest thing we can do.
some criticism that I hope you will find constructive: Be careful of slipping into old fashioned language, you want to carve out your own poetic voice not recreate the classics. I try to avoid using numerical values in poetry eg. 'a million pains' try find a descriptive way of conveying that value eg. 'a sea of pains' although obviously thats a tired and cliched example. If you're using a rhyme scheme I would keep it consistent or only use it in specific places for dramatic emphasis, or to highlight a crux in the poem. try to avoid sli;ping in and out of rhyme arbitrarily. good poem all round though, i enjoyed a lot of the imagery in it :)

[Colton Warr]

Thank you so William Arthur! I appreciate the Criticism, that's how we get better. I will take what you have said and try and apply it to future pieces. I'm glad you enjoyed the piece though! Thanks for reading!

[E.K.Donaldson]

Great imagery. You really pulled me into the poem. I felt that I could see in my head rather clearly what was happening in the poem. Thanks for sharing!

[Colton Warr]

Thank you so much! Thanks for stopping by and giving this a read! Thanks for reading!

[Ishita Dixit]

I loved it Colton!
The imagery, the beauty, the emotions...
Well done!

[Colton Warr]

Thank you very much! I'm glad you enjoyed it! Thanks for reading!