Broken Petal

Broken Petal

A Poem by Tasha
"

My take on he loves me he loves me not.

"
I love it when you call me beautiful,

But I hate it when you say I'm ugly

I love it when you hold my hand,

And hate it when you don't take me around your friends

I love it when you hold me close,

But hate it when you say you need space


I love you
And I hate you
I want to be with you,
But I feel like I'm selling myself short
Love should be a two way street
And if your not with me
I must be better off without you
So I count my petals
One by one
It says I love you not ...

© 2011 Tasha


Author's Note

 Tasha
This has nothing to do with me, I just wrote it. Hope you like it.

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Featured Review

He loves me, he loves me not. This made me wonder more if the protagonist loved herself enough to cut the tie with someone who treated her so poorly. I'm glad she wises up at the end!

I could be way off base here, (I know you were playing with format here, and being creative,) but by having the last stanza in such small lettering and so compacted, it gives the illusion that her words lack real conviction. I think it would make more impact for her words to get stronger and bolder. Just MHO.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Love/hate relationships, I know this one well. I liked this poem, very honest.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I believe these words were at some time on the tongues of most women. You compose truth so vividly and beautifully.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.



Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I really like how you can create emotions that are not connected to you but they still seem that way. This is really good.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Great Write !

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Love is not! A two way street, love never looks for a return,like It's a bargaining chip, but gives freely, forgives easily and suffers quietly... Enjoyed the poem though

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

just one word to describe it....AWESOME!

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I like this allot, because at this point in time with my relationship i am in this boat. And it seems like no matter how hard I try or what I say that nothing is going to change him. ever. I don't know what to do but I think your poem has given me an idea.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I agree with the two way street metaphor, love should be all or nothing there is no inbetween or compromise. Beautifully written, love the way it was set out at beginning statement after statement each one truth. Keep em' coming

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Its like theres a good side to it.. then a downside then a goodside then a downside etc... yes Iove this!

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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1134 Views
50 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on July 28, 2011
Last Updated on July 28, 2011

Author

 Tasha
Tasha

NC



About
Hey, I'm 18 years old and I love writing. "To know me is to love me" "Every heart has a beat and mine just skips for you" Wanna know more? Message me I love to make new friends. &heart.. more..

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