Just a Dream

 

Can you hear me

As I whisper your name?

Across the ocean

It travels in vain.

 

Can you see me

As I stretch out my hand?

Across the miles

To a distant land.

 

Can you feel me

As I caress your cheek?

Across my mind

It’s you that I seek.

 

Can you love me

As I draw you near?           

Or was it just a dream?

You were never really here.

 

 

 

Reviews

[Adrian K. Smith]

I think the fourth stanza poses the most intriguing question, in the sense that the Love itself is what may have been the dream - while the rest - was reality. Yes, I know I tend to charge out to left field sometimes; but you could be standing right next to the person and wonder if the emotions were a dream...

[Michael X]

to be felt- to be seen- when whispering in dreams.. posing certain question, stretching out the hand
across the miles toward distant lands, capturing what it means when connecting through space

and time- in general scope you also define what it means to think about those people and places
that make up the existence of a dream- as your passionate words flow as a romantic remembrance.

the alternate rhyme form gave your words a nice beat that carries the reader across the miles.
truly lovely work and a pleasure to read, your pen is never ceasing.

Take care. Mike

[Arthur Henn]

OK gang again this is just me, nothing going on between Dani and I, I just really like this poem she wrote and had to come back and write another comment of a poem LOL
___________________________________________________
"These Arms I Surrender"

Capturing shadows in the palms of my hands
I hear you whisper his name
Your beauty flows upon the sand
Of his tender heart

Wanting to hold you
Seeing you smile
Guiding you across deep waters
Into a paradise of love

Holding you upright
He carries you off
Nowhere to be seen
I'm missing you

These words I surrender
Flow across the bridge of my heart
Watching the love you share
Wanting to be his arms
That holds you

As I draw near to you
Within the dreams I dream
You become more a reality

Arthur henn

[JadedSparrow]

Can you love me
As I draw you near?
Or was it just a dream?
You were never really here.

The last two lines are a startling reality I am learning to face. A beautifully written piece. Very easy to read, even more so b/c of where I am in my life right now. Thanks for sharing...

[Blue Sky]

The heart whispers the words
desires become dreams

'Can you love me
As I draw you near
Or was it just a dream,
You wre never really here.

and yet another remarkable piece from you Dani
you are so awesome, making it all look so nifty!
Such an excellent poem!!

[Arthur Henn]

Can I write another comment of a poem. I'm feeling inspired again...lol

[Dizzy-Izzy]

This is really pretty. I think every writer/poet has a secret heart. Thanks for a peek at yours.

Kristina

[ANNA]

I pictured this as me and how I would write it. Your words color my soul and open my gray sky's for the love that wants so badly to hold me.. Thanks for posting this piece. I think you poems make me bleed my soul out for the good. So other can be just as creative as you..!

Much love n respect,
Anna..huggs

[Siddartha Beth Pierce]

Lovely sentiments about love that is seperated by miles whether in reality or just across the table as can be so sometimes. Nicely done. Thank you for sharing your talent. I really like the succinct quality of this poem.
Light,
Siddartha

[Anima Inspired]

It's funny, because i just posted a poem that had to do with dreams...and I find that when speaking of dreams theres is an almost innate sense of the ethereal. This piece was more concrete...it asked questions, delved in to the relam of dreams as though it was reality; I like this.

[The Autumn Faerie]

-shivers-
Wow, definite deja vu...
Very well-written.

~Raye