What You Could Be

I can't believe I wrote a poem. Well, enjoy.

Brawling in the Garden,

Breaking through the windows,

All of us are prophets,

If you count the zeros.

 

All the roaming monsters,

All the wretched heroes

It doesn’t make a difference,

At least as far as speed goes.

 

Learn your lesson quickly

Get behind the devil

Unless you want your a*s kicked,

It’s really f****n’ simple.

 

Braving Armageddon,

Livin’ in the future,

something for the chosen,

it really doesn’t matter,

 

Be better than the rest of ‘em,

Cuz life is what you make it,

and when your life is like this,

you’d better not forsake it

 

Remember that we’re human,

No matter who denies it,

And we can still be happy,

It’s better they despise it.

 

Now,

Is the time,

And the place,

Revolution calls . . .

 

To-day,

Is the day,

And the moment

Evolution crawls,

 

Do - you . . .

 See,

At the end,

Of the road,

That you’re standing on your own?

 

Wont you --

Li-sten to me,

You must speak free,

Don’t look,

 just see,

What you could be.

 

Author's Note

Sorry if it's bad. I don't really do poetry.

Reviews

[David W Moore III]

All of us are prophets if you count the zeroes - great line. I like this. I'll have to check out some of your stories.

[Lorame]

This is an interesting piece. The kind that one should read more than once to fully grasp the meaning of it. I like the point it makes. Nice write!

[JelliFyshKissUs]

You don't really do poetry? I can't tell. This poem is brilliant. Don't you know that novelists are the greatest poets? I will grab hold of the tail of your jacket and follow you wherever you go if you keep writing things like these. Kudos!

[Moonflower]

This was very interesting, I enjoyed the metapohors in the beginning. The ending could flow better but still got the message across. I like the ending, its simple and to the point. Over all a good piece, I think with some editing it could be pretty amazing ;)

[Ice QueenJen]

I to like Taylor said, you did a great job. I really loved how this flowed so freely, its as if you are floating on the air as you write. Do try writing another poem when the mood suits you. I never thought I could write a poem, but I have; let alone over 200! Although you write stories, like Apple comp. says " think outside the box!" and always challenge yourself as a writer.

[Taylor H.]

This isn't bad. Its really not! Great Job. I really enjoyed this. You have a real talent.

[wthz freestylen]

Brawling in the Garden,

Breaking through the windows,

All of us are prophets,

If you count the zeros.



All the roaming monsters,

All the wretched heroes

It doesn’t make a difference,

At least as far as speed goes.



Learn your lesson quickly

Get behind the devil

Unless you want your a*s kicked,

It’s really f****n’ simple.

bro don't deny yourself this one man, never say your work is bad either, k rino said "i can ride and believe your great, but if you dont know it my thoughts carry no weight" Believe it man, your a hella of a poet actually the words flowing out
freestlye is the key man, when its 1st thoughts its all u

[Bette]

i really like this much better than some of the other things i have read.. well done

this is pretty good for someone who doesn't "really do poetry"
could turn this into a pretty decent set of lyrics.

[Miss Coral]

It's really good-- pretty unique and interesting style. I like how you controlled the rhythm with hyphens. The tone was really well developed, and your words were powerful. Great write. :)