A Beat Of The Wings

Antenna and feelers picking up scent

Descends upon flowers, the honey well-spent

Hops bed-to-bed, escapes vent-to-vent

A meander on breezes

with hovering intent

Its vacuum absorbing all that is bright

Consumption for colour, all red, black, and white

Flawless, yet fragile, a glorious sight

Fearsome to predator

Evasive in flight

Stuck in a cobweb, caught in a net

Energy burnt like a quick cigarette

Blood-letting, conflict, deep-red in debt

A gamble of moments

On a destiny bet

Life is short and existence small

Life is a butterfly perched on a wall

Fly away Peter, fly away Paul

A beat of the wings

Then it's death to us all

Reviews

[Sara]

okay, this is going into my favorites, like, right now. :) it's very beautiful... there is just a delicate sensitivity about it that immediately speaks to me... that last stanza leaves me speechless ('fly away peter, fly away paul' = is there such a thing as religious romanticism because that line is fantastic)... today i overheard someone say 'the universe doesn't give a s**t about us' -- i think you're saying the same thing here, just in a more gentle, intricately woven way... wonderful rumination on the frailty and transience of life. total love.

(ehh, just reread what i wrote, and sorry if i sound off, i'm very tired... to bed nao. bye.)

[Truly Ross-Wisehart]

This is absolutely beautiful and so delicate. The rhythm and rhyme impeccable. Wonderful metaphor from start to finish. To pick out specific lines does a disservice the the whole. It is just really well-balanced and fantastic in its imagery. You always raise the bar! Excellent!

~True

[Elizabeth]

Flawless yet fragile. I like that paradox.

[Ashley.M.E]

this is really good I love it Your words just flew off my computer screen a great read thanks for the read request

[R E Tree]

I love how skillful you are at using words that create such a good flow. It's like magic. I believe in it and so it works. Your such a inspiring writer and I liked the imagery. I have a great imagination that goes wild with your poem. Butterflys I wonder whats next...

[Ishan Sadwelkar]

This has a very good and strong structure.
Many many nice metaphors. That's what I liked.
Specially the cigarette, the predator and the process of pollination.

The minimal use of punctuations lends a nice connection between stanzas.

[Crowley]

I think this may be one the best poems I have ever read on any of the sites I visit. I love the cadence and the flow, and the rhyming is spot on. You can write my friend...maybe I can forgive you for your comments about hairy men now that I know you can write. Nice work.

[Ruth]

This is excellent Devons, love:)
You have gracefully captured the feeling of the image really well, elegantly moving and emotional:)
Wonderful poem
xx