It's unfair...

A sad story within a poem...

I was happy in my way

It was you who interrupted

Still I hated you

Till when it got unexpected...

      I never looked at you

      It was you who stared

      Whatever you did

      I never cared...

You let me know

The care you had for me

And I could not deny

Cause I too was able to see…

      I began to search

      The hidden miracle in you

      You showed up in happiness

      I thought it was true…

I asked you for friendship

You gifted me with great pleasure

I lived in it cheerfully

As every time you did assure…

      Each day we lived to the fullest

      With unexplained blushes and smiles

      Each night we hoped the best

      With innumerable messages till miles…

Then you told over the phone

That it was something called love

It felt me like a dream

Like god had sent an angel from above…

      You promised me

      To fulfill each wish of mine

      You were the first to say this

      And in me you began to shine…

You let me know about your past

And I heard being strong

For a moment I thought

All my thoughts were wrong…

      You proved that she was the only one

      Whom your heart you would lend

      Still I kept patience

      Because then I was only your friend…

The fine line which we had crossed

Could then never bring us back

I kept shedding tears

Asking myself what did I lack…

      I did not want you

      To become my past

      Cause once you assured me

      That it would ever last…

I accepted your past

As well as you

Still I was waiting for you to say

That it was not at all true…

      Time passed by

      And it seems everything was gone

      Only your writings did remain

      For making me hurt and torn…

If it is told ‘trust in god’

Who even broke the best pair

Then god must realize

It was really unfair…

 

 

Author's Note

Something that really hurts... saying, its really unfair...
hope you like the story within the poem...
I am in wait for your honest reviews...

Reviews

[Jerryyoung1z]

One of my favorites ways of writing poems is by telling a story which you have done perfectly here. It all flowed gracefully until the very last line. I believe that we don't really get the people we want, but the people we need; they would shape us so that when we finally get the one we want, we would be able to appreciate that gift. So yeah, everything happens for a reason, no matter how unfair it seems or appears.

[Anindita Janhabee]

So very right dear writer...
Yes all happens for a reason... may be good or bad... there's always a reason behind. So it's needed to flow and keep going until we find the one we want...
Thanks again for the review...

[Jerryyoung1z]

You're welcome

[Bala Gorthi]

This is my first read of yours......
The pain came out very well in this write. It took me long to reach the end, you know what I mean here. The last four lines are touching indeed.
When we are in extreme pain, it is the God whom we seek and blame. This poem is very humane and very natural.
It really hurts, may be for years in some cases and relations. Maturity never comes without experience.
The pain we experience makes us better human beings.
Thanks for sharing this piece. keep sharing... :-)

PS: I accidentally posted this in your other post.

[Anindita Janhabee]

Thanks a lot for the review ..
that's alright...

[Happy hours]

i can sense the feeling of compromise...very well written... :)

[Anindita Janhabee]

Thanks for stopping by...

[hi]

i came for the title..now you said be honest, ok

to be honest i think taking a few words off might make it a better feel,
and speak of feel the color red you used made it seem like anger but the poem was more blue, know what i mean,

its a good poem but seems like it is trying to be dark when it is not

[Anindita Janhabee]

Thanks dear...
I'm glad you could sense light from this even when it was quite dark...
always pleasure reading ur reviews!!

[Sudeep Mishra]

Lured by the title, I would like to say the feelings you expressed were deep and true. Strong emotions, affection or love may be a boon or may be fatal too. Although it is capricious, but it is you who has the power to reveal its trueness. Handle the hearts and souls with care, once they are broken it is very hard to mend.

[Anindita Janhabee]

Thank you Sudeep for ur time reading my work... The only odia guy I found here...hehehehe... Thanks again...

[Sudeep Mishra]

Haha.. and the only odia girl I found here! Your welcome.

[Anindita Janhabee]

Mr. odia, aren't u too much joking ?
It would be a pleasure talking to U....
Atleast someone reminds me of my mother tongue... hehehehe.. : )

[April Showers]

It's quite moving, the progression of this from something that begins as friendship and opens hearts and minds and then to that fear of letting go of something in the past.

It really shows us how hopes can be crushed so easily and how much it hurts.

[Anindita Janhabee]

yes...
thanks for your time reading...

[Monchie]

Life, and love can be really unfair, you are right... But you can't give up, just have to go forward! :)

Nice write :)

[Anindita Janhabee]

Right....
thank you for your time reading and reviewing...

[Monchie]

You are welcome. :)

[Daisy]

That is so touching! To have such depth in your writing at such an young age makes you a truly incredible person. The way you have depicted the feelings of friendship unsteadily blending with love and yet the hope amidst all the forlorn despair is remarkable. It's utterly realistic and the way you have portrayed the innumerable hues of emotions makes it all the more special and definitely worth cherishing! M looking forward to more of your amazing works! Lots of love :)

[Anindita Janhabee]

Thank you so much Daisy!!!!
for the wonderful words... and ur time reading.....thanks a lot...lol... : )

[Sophia V]

Oh my god. This might be my favorite poem. I am completely obsessed with this. I can relate which makes it even more meaningful to me. I just love this so much, please keep writing! :)
-Sophia

[Anindita Janhabee]

I am glad you could make it...
yes, it's really touchy...
thanks... : )

[Karmee]

such an emotional read, this tugged on my heart,
I like this long read. I think that was needed to make a full expression on your feelings.
This is really good, I like how you got your emotions out.
Very nicely presented.

[Anindita Janhabee]

Ohh... thank you so much for your time in my little work....
I am glad you liked it....
Yes, its the longest poem of mine till now and some say the best too....
thank you, stay in touch....
hv a nice day : )

[Karmee]

no problem and you too