It's unfair...

A sad story within a poem...

I was happy in my way

It was you who interrupted

Still I hated you

Till when it got unexpected...

      I never looked at you

      It was you who stared

      Whatever you did

      I never cared...

You let me know

The care you had for me

And I could not deny

Cause I too was able to see…

      I began to search

      The hidden miracle in you

      You showed up in happiness

      I thought it was true…

I asked you for friendship

You gifted me with great pleasure

I lived in it cheerfully

As every time you did assure…

      Each day we lived to the fullest

      With unexplained blushes and smiles

      Each night we hoped the best

      With innumerable messages till miles…

Then you told over the phone

That it was something called love

It felt me like a dream

Like god had sent an angel from above…

      You promised me

      To fulfill each wish of mine

      You were the first to say this

      And in me you began to shine…

You let me know about your past

And I heard being strong

For a moment I thought

All my thoughts were wrong…

      You proved that she was the only one

      Whom your heart you would lend

      Still I kept patience

      Because then I was only your friend…

The fine line which we had crossed

Could then never bring us back

I kept shedding tears

Asking myself what did I lack…

      I did not want you

      To become my past

      Cause once you assured me

      That it would ever last…

I accepted your past

As well as you

Still I was waiting for you to say

That it was not at all true…

      Time passed by

      And it seems everything was gone

      Only your writings did remain

      For making me hurt and torn…

If it is told ‘trust in god’

Who even broke the best pair

Then god must realize

It was really unfair…

 

 

Author's Note

Something that really hurts... saying, its really unfair...
hope you like the story within the poem...
I am in wait for your honest reviews...

Reviews

[stars are far]

First Im sorry for my late response but i wasnt home and i startd my new job so everything is kinda messed up lately.
About your poem: I think thats about friendship love, like you are so friendzoned and then you fell in love with your friend and he lover her. And I can relate to that. i know how hard that feeling is, but everything must come to an end (my story didnt end yet,it just started but i know everything will end in no time). And darling when it all ends you will look back and smile, not because you are happy that it didnt happen but because you had the guts to move on. And hey lady, we have the power and you have to always be sure that men arenot as powerful as us. Im not saying they arent powerful but we are strong, when we move on nothing will make us go back and thats what you should always remember. You can try ( I will not tell you that you are a princess and you should just sit on your chair and wait for your charming ,becuase in real life princesses go for the one their family likes and for who is availabe), so be a princess with your soul not actions. And when you try, you wont regret losing anything becuase when you look back you will know that you couldnt have done anything other than that !. And hey lady, believe me no one will fall in love with you if you have given them everything they desire. I hope you get my point.
And your poem was expressed in a good way. I liked it :)
Have a good day lady :)
*Suhad*

[The Girl on Fire]

It was lovely and rightfully expressed!
Though I personally think that there was something not correct in 'It felt me like a dream'. I mean, I can't find any sense in this line. Hope it helped, if I'm not wrong.

Otherwise it was a sad and touching story, beautifully written!

[Ashwin Shanker]

Simplistic and effective writing. Often the gift of writers is that we are able to capture those emotions which everyone feels, and then bring them alive on paper (or in this case, the screen.)
It is truly a gift that we have, and I am sure a lot of people would be able to closely relate to the feelings written above, I know I could.
Keep writing.

[Anindita Janhabee]

You're right... I am glad you could relate.... Thanks for the time reading...

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Anindita, you have penned a touching yet beautiful piece of loss and love. Sometimes, a few people in our lives come and go like many others but leave an altered versions of ourselves at their wake. Their mere existence touch and change us in strange ways that we cannot comprehend. But I assure you dear, that time is the best medicine, it can cure even the deepest of wounds. So don't worry, one day you will grow up to become a bold lady and many a man will come and go, but you will be strong and intelligent enough to spot the special one. Till then invest time in nurturing yourself. Remember, Happiness is a choice and it's your call to take.
Good luck.
Jyoti

[Anindita Janhabee]

Thank you so much Jyoti for your melodious words... thanks a lot... yeah, it's only you people who make me bold and support me... I am glad enough....
: )

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Good to know. :)

[D]

I've let myself dive deep in your beautiful words...
Felt as if someone's whispering these lines... Like when you sit in a cafe, and hear out someone's pain. It was a beautiful, and sad read. You're amazing.

[Anindita Janhabee]

Thank you so much dear poet... Yes, it's very sad and painful... But honestly, life has been too much unfair for me, but I am trying my best to heal myself now. All of your words are a way to the healing..........

[D]

My pleasure :) Write, speak your heart, and I shall listen :)

[Anindita Janhabee]

ohh dear you are so much sweet... I just read about you and to be Frank, it is something special....and good too... : )
I am glad for your warm support...
I don't usually send read requests but obviously expect my friends to read my works by themselves.... a long way learning....nice to see you here.....

[D]

Read about me...? wonder who did I upset now...(just kidding)

and after reading this piece, I will read your work without any request. :)

[Anindita Janhabee]

Thanks a lot... you know..actually I too don't read as per requests, I open random profiles, and read works...and believe me, this really works.. I have a best friend here who supports me a lot. I had a fight with him recently. I wrote 4-5 chapters which included our relationship. I didn't ask him to read but he read all of those and also sent an overall review to my mail box later... isn't it funny?? : ) hahahaha...

[D]

Well if he was rude...Then it isn't funny...

[Anindita Janhabee]

Nope he's never rude with me, in fact I am rude at times.. and the fight had begun because of me. The reason was that I didn't like what he did. He told me about a girl, who interrupted between us... I hate such girls, how can they be so much jealous? Even I don't know being jealous till today..

[D]

Oh well then... I guess he ran into some confusion. And don't blame yourself over the jealousy of others. As Churchill said once "You have enemies? Good! That means you're doing something right." :)

[Anindita Janhabee]

Yep... thanks so much... I am learning much from you, advantages of having a good friend....

[D]

My pleasure. :)

[D]

You've mentioned reading about me... I'm curious. lol

[hcarson]

I really like what you have done here, the indented sections kind of made mme read it almost as though it was being said as an afterthought. Sad as the story is it is a well told one, clear and concise with feelings we all sadly have felt, both the good and the bad. Love it 😀

[Anindita Janhabee]

Thanks a lot ma'am. I am even more sad and touchy about what has happened in the past... I hope everything goes fair with all of you....

[hcarson]

Your writing is wonderful, love the way u express it 😊

[GHAAZI]

can't be a poem bt a narrated dialog

[Anindita Janhabee]

Thanks for visiting... Feedbacks are always a support to me...

[mou]

you portrait a story in a poetry format while maintaining a beautiful rhythm as well..though I always think that for any writing ,a well format or glorious sentence formation is not so important ,because it is all about feelings which just need words to flow and nothing else..when I look at your writing, the colored vision was very pretty but the content just stands at the opposite pole..don't know whether you mean it or not but I find it that you try to flow your tears in a disguise of a colorful smile which we often do to suppress the pain in real life..
as there is a line "a smile which struggles through the tears is the most precious one" and I want to dedicate the line for your this writing too..hope I don't need to say more..
just beautiful!!
always keep up..

[Anindita Janhabee]

Thank u so much mousumi for the kind words.. yes u are right. Actually, I wrote this poem crying, late night... So I didn't bother so much about its content or whatever. Just wrote out from my heart, keeping rhymes in mind... I am glad for ur honest and wonderful review dear... Thanks for the sweet and true line again.. very true words said... Smile and tears sometimes run simultaneously, thereby making it all a struggle of life, neither happiness nor sadness... : )

[mou]

yeah and you are welcome dear :)

[Emeka Okelze Peter]

I am so excited reading your poem..you can review mine and see

[Anindita Janhabee]

thank you...
glad u liked reading...
I will see soon...

[Michael (Letters and Li..]

Wow, Anindita! This was so beautiful but so heart wrenching at the same time. I love the flow and the feeling of angst that pours out of all your wonderful phrasing. I can definitely relate to this. Such raw emotion. Thank you for sharing, my friend!

[Anindita Janhabee]

That's common dear, when you get so much of unfairness in your life, poetry comes from the heart... And honestly, I didn't even realize what I wrote in this poem, just wrote unintentionally... : )

[Ananya]

A very heartfelt write, Anu. It's so unfair....I am amazed at how a little girl like you, can describe these feelings so well. Good work. Life is mostly unfair.

[Anindita Janhabee]

ohh dear Anu, thanks so much for the cute review.. u r right though, life is totally unfair...
by the way, u r Anu, and me Ani... : )