I Never Fight Personalities

I Never Fight Personalities

A Story by One Lost Anti-Hero

This is something silly I wrote.


Well here I am standing on top of the earth holding up a giant meteor while the humans lick there caramel apples; definitely not the best weekend I've ever had. You see I am one of few people you call god and I was just going to get a copy of my favorite light novel when...wait how did I end up here? I grabbed my pocket watch and saw that it was five o’clock Central Standard time. The meteor was pretty hot, not like fresh hot pocket hot, but definitely a close second. The meteor was almost past the exosphere and wasn't compromising with the whole shrinking business. Now I know what your wondering, how did I get such a lovely trench coat and how did I meet my lovely wife. Well I went to England and...

“Um hate to ruin your little monologue, but I think we are gonna die from this.” I saw my dumb brother Tommy holding the meteor with me.” I say dumb in a loving way, like how some people love spiders or being kidnapped by a monkey. “You know maybe we should just let this thing fall and move our families. I mean its not like we have to save these humans, right? Wait why are we doing this in the first place.”

“Wives/kin.” I point down to earth and we both sigh for what have become of us.

“I do this because I want to. For the safety of earth, for Ameri...” My other brother Donny that I tend to forget exists was putting way too much effort for this.

“Shut it Donny!” Tommy and I said in sync.

“But I am just trying to help.” Donny looked sad, but he should know his place.

“Yea no. I get that your like lonely and stuff, but like we had a thing going on. I was gonna banter with Tommy, we fight a bit, but then show that we grew stronger for it. We even had our character defined and everything.” I smacked his head.

“Can I be the comic relief?” Donny was serious, he wanted to take the most important role.

“No you can be that guy that no one likes. Now leave us to go do our thing.” Donny flew back down to Earth leaving me and Tommy with this rock thing. “So what were we doing again?

“Dying to this thing, you know nothing much.” Tommy's arm was beginning to melt off faster than he could regenerate. It smelt awful, but considering that my sweat was burning faster than I could perspire I wasn't one to judge.

“Oh ya this is happening right now.” I could feel my body running out of juice as I tried to repel this monster of a rock. “So besides dying right now, whats been happening with your family?

“My son just joined an animation company and is working on a new project. They work in France and transfer between Canada so you know nothing big, you?” He released his bright flames to try to burn off the rock, but it did little against this humongous thing.

“My daughter's light novel has just announced that its gonna be made into an anime so you know not much.” I smiled as I released a large electric blast through the entire thing, but it only chipped a small amount of pieces off the beast. I could see my memories fly by as pain surged through my entire being it was like being stabbed everywhere on my body.

“What are our chances of living this.” He turned to me and asked.

“100 percent if we turn tail and run.” I smiled as I tried to ignore the pain.

“And their chances living if we let this hit?” I just shook my head and focused on pushing this thing or blowing it up. “Yea I thought so. Any regrets besides you know dying.”

“Yeah, not being able to see your kids new animation. I am sure it was gonna be great.” My body gave out and released a large electric blast making the meteor go in the other direction.

“I wish I could of saw that anime too. Knowing that it was you're girl's work makes it all the more irresistible.” Tommy and my body were sent flying back down to the surface of the earth. With what little energy I had left I angled our bodies so that we would sink into the ocean. It wasn't hard considering there is like over seventy percent ocean. So this is how I die, falling down to earth with no strength next to my rival, who's already knocked out and burning up in the atmosphere. No Dragonballs to bring us back, no Tardis to fix this anomaly, and definitely no plot armor to miraculously save us. Definitely not our best weekend, but lets see how it all began.

“Hey wake up.” Oh no the meteor is crumbling I need to push it away- “My parents are almost here wake up!” Now the world is starting to collapse this is impossible, but somehow- (smack) I fell onto the floor with a concentrated sting on my right cheek. Samantha, a blue haired girl who was wearing jean shorts and my muscle shirt was sitting on top of me.

“Where is the meteor and all the people yelling in the streets. Where is our daughter she was suppose to shape the anime industry?!” I frantically looked around and found I was in an apartment that was as plain as flavorless oatmeal.

“Six million years ago, two weeks til the thanksgiving parade, and she moved to Japan as an English teacher and working on her novel so give it some time. It was a dream now get dressed and cook something light for my parents. They can't eat anything too heavy cause of their stomach so try to make it good.” I am so confused it was so surreal and yet it wasn't. I felt like my life was a lie made for that life threatening reality to come true. I surveyed my surroundings hoping that it would be a joke or something. There is no way that I can be living in this place with this above average looking girl. I must have passed out from the meteor hitting this is my dream. That explains the girl the normal circumstances and everything. As I pondered my thoughts Samantha was getting furious; it was like she knew what I was thinking or something.

“Your thinking something weird again aren't you!” She smothered my cheeks together and shook my head like a snow globe. My head was swirling so much that I forgot what I was thinking about. She stopped shaking me and stared into my soul. “I don't mind you thinking about other worlds or other situations, but don't ever forget that this place is yours.” I responded with a disjointed yes. Samantha kissed my sore cheeks and stood up. “I'm gonna go work on the comic a bit more so have dinner without me. Also be sure to give me the next chapter with all those juicy details.”

“Okay.” I got lost in my dreams and stories again. I can't help it since my personality is an infp and I like to zone out to enjoy the worlds I write. “Hey Samantha what comic are you working on by the way?” She raised an eyebrow as if I had said something weird.

“Are you alright? Its your stories that we turned to a web comic, remember silly.”

“Oh yea!”

“You really need to stay in reality more or you'll get lost.”

“But you always find me right?”

“That why I married you.” We both stuck out tongues out at each other smiling brighter than any star. I got up and went into the kitchen wondering why I even leave reality sometimes maybe its because in every world I make my queen is always there or maybe its because its fun. Who knows maybe that world might come true one day.   

© 2015 One Lost Anti-Hero

Author's Note

One Lost Anti-Hero
I wanted to make something funny and at the same time about the personality so I came up with this creature. I'm not sure what it is, but since I am an Infp I usually act this way so thats why I did it.

My Review

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This is a very enjoyable read. I particularly liked the out of reality scenes and how you brought it all back down to the level of 'my' human understanding. Very good. I would say, don't give up on developing more life journey experiences for this character. Good work.

Posted 6 Years Ago

One Lost Anti-Hero

6 Years Ago

Oh this character for me is like a 5 min commercial when it comes to my stories. I was originally go.. read more
This was really entertaining and interesting to read! :) I'm glad to hear from your perspective and peek into your world. Great write!

Posted 6 Years Ago

One Lost Anti-Hero

6 Years Ago

Actually this isn't my life, its a life I created for a character that I stopped working on. He's ba.. read more

6 Years Ago

oh that's cool x) very nice work

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2 Reviews
Added on August 1, 2015
Last Updated on August 1, 2015


One Lost Anti-Hero
One Lost Anti-Hero


I'm just a person that can be described in very few words. Shy, simple, and human are just to name a few. I like to put on a mask and use various personalities to try to make things as relaxing If we .. more..