Apparently I have a problem

I wrote this ion April 07, pre-deletion day, I think I asked the question .... How do you think I am?

Apparently I have a problem

My heart is too large.

Recently someone that shall remain nameless started to list out the amount of times I have helped people against the amount of times I have been ripped off. Although they were just off the cuff examples the list was huge. Automatically I jumped to the attack position but why did I do this? isn't helping people something to be proud of?

 

OK, so yes I admit it, I give way to much but the crux of the matter is I am not going to stop.  It is in my make up to be this way. 

 

I will NEVER judge one person by another.  For  example, say if I helped 100 people and 80 of those people ripped me off but the other 20 people were in desperate need of my help ..... why should I not help those 20 people just because I have been shafted before.  I can't do it ..... sorry, but thats a fact.  I can not and will not be this way.

 

It is the same with loved ones, why should I judge one person by anothers wrong doings? Why should I not forgive the person that apologises for their mistakes and certainly makes up for them?

 

Everyday we are judged my race, colour, creed, sex, age.  We are judged on everything from our weight to the car we drive. F*ck that, I wont become part of that. I do not judge someone who prefer's Girls Aloud to Blur, I do not judge the person who wears heels when flats are this seasons must have, so why the bloody hell would I judge the person who needs my help.

 

A true story for you to consider.

 

Last year whilst walking down the street I found 2 dollars on the path, me being me I picked them up.  50 yards along the street I came across 2 people: a disabled man sat in a wheelchair with  his cry for help written on cardboard and a woman with a bell collecting for a christmas charity.  I divided the 2 dollars between them and went on my way. 

 

They were not my dollars, and despite there being other people around at that time I was the only one to stoop and pick them up, I guess vanity stopped them, I think someone had left them for me. 

Anyway a few hours later walking down the same street I slipped quite harshly in the snow (ok I was wearing impractical shoes, but they were cute shoes), before I could right myself the man in the wheelchair had shot his chair forward to catch me.  Did he remember me from earlier? I doubt it, did he see stupid blonde English girl? I doubt he had time to think at all, did he just see someone that needed help? YES.  He did not judge, he saw someone that needed help and tried to help them.

 

Unfortunately there are some people that will never be kind (oh and just so you know the person who listed my good deads/failures is actually very kind), I/we know who they are, I/we also know that those people will never be happy.

 

Kindness turns monsters into human beings, and lack of it works vice versa.

 

Are you a monster?

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[Captain Goldpants]

I read this before - way before I was on Writer's Caf�. Living from the heart, benefit of doubt and random, or other acts of generosity or kindness make this world turn. Whilst being a sucker is not desirable, proper 'rip offs' are the in the inherent bad character of the con artist and not the person who has innocently offered help or support. The criticism you have received is either out of pity, or jealousy - neither of which hold you to that big heart you describe.

M, I painted what I thought a big, big heart looked like. I put it in my photos here to show Helen Woodward (who I miss) - have a look! ;-)

[Susan M. Fenn]

You are a wonderful, kind, and caring woman. Strong and much more and beyond that of which makes the world go round. You are more than anyone could ever have labeled you, and you are ten times the person that your own "abuser" could ever even halway form the thought to be.

[Crazy Cat Man]

Who are you? You are a beautiful woman with a lot of heart and passion who writes genuine and sincere poems that makes us think.

[KC]

I think you're a smart person, relating to the world in the only way you know how- through words.