What Do I Want From You

What Do I Want From You

A Poem by Neville

 

What do I want from you

Now you are gone away

 

I want to chase that mint

Around your mouth

With my tongue again

 

I want to trace my name

On your shoulder blade

With my thumb again

 

I want to probe and peek

Play hide and seek and to

Locate that long lost crumb again

 

These are but a few of the things

I want from you

Now you are gone away

 

© 2018 Neville


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Featured Review

'What Do I Want From You'
Neville,
I think you had fun with this one. It shows the memory and it's life. The things, experiences that stick out in our souls when that time is gone. Relationships can be complicated of course but this writing gives permission to simply enjoy the little things which are not so small after all.
Blessings as always!
Kathy

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Neville

2 Years Ago


Please excuse my late response to your very kind review note Kathy .. Much appreciated as al.. read more



Reviews

We do remember those little things, don't we? Your poem is intimate and pensive in it's revealing of those kinds of things that make relationships so captivating and desirable. They are another kind of "lost crumb".

Posted 6 Years Ago


Neville

6 Years Ago

You are of course absolutely correct Samuel & many thanks to you for considering these words of mine.. read more
Sweetly painted the passion between two people... somehow it's the small things that you miss most... lovely poem.... :)

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Neville

6 Years Ago

Thank you so very much Galadriel, I so much appreciate the visit................And yes, tis the sma.. read more
Beautifully painted brush strokes of those 'our moment' memories and rituals which adorn long close relationships. I also like your maintenance of a structure and the repetition of the open 'u' sound to close each stanza. Nice work, and poignant.

BRs Nigel

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Neville

6 Years Ago

Hey, I am so grateful for your visit Nigel, am lost for words, no kidding.....All Good Things, Nevil.. read more
This is a brilliant peek into the seemingly insignificant interactions that form the glue for many relationships. Good choice of details fleshed out with fresh simplicity. This is the poster child for show instead of tell (first rule of good writing) becuz you're showing us that old nugget of wisdom about how we miss the little things the most! *sigh!* (((NUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Neville

6 Years Ago

Oh' yes I am...
barleygirl

6 Years Ago

You freakin' tease! If I ever got you alone out here in the wilderness, you might not be able to fin.. read more
Neville

6 Years Ago

Gonna shoot myself in both feet write now, just to make sure ya catch me first........
Delightfully quirky, but this masks the yearning intimacy but thinly veiled by it. Reading it is like watching someone who is putting a brave face on things but is as close to tears as ..

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Neville

11 Years Ago

Many thanks R.J, I very much appreciate your reading this & your take on it too. regards, N
This is a beautiful portrayal of remembered intimacy , it is the little things...
really enjoyed this Neville

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Neville

11 Years Ago

Bless you Shelley, your comments are greatly appreciated. All Good Things, N
Hi Nev I have of course read this on our site but I still love it. Taking your reminicance down to very ordinary experiences gives it a 'lived in' quality. Have you changed it?

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This comment has been deleted by the poster.
ohhhhh yes! Every stanza.. every one.. got me, made me smile, lingered and kept me transfixed. I loved how I could feel your wanting. This nostalgic piece is very well done!

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Neville

11 Years Ago

Wow Heather, you just made my evening. Your comments are most welcome, many thanks & All Good Things.. read more
John Alexander McFadyen

11 Years Ago

Hey Nev she's a sweet talker is she not lol!
What vivid examples that make me see and remember my own. Well done...it lingers.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Neville

11 Years Ago

Wow, thank you CAF / Shimmerbliss and I thought I was the only one out there. All Good Things N
Shimmerbliss/CAF

11 Years Ago

Nope, we are many. :)
Neville

11 Years Ago

Phew, don't go away. N

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1244 Views
29 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 1 Library
Added on August 11, 2012
Last Updated on March 9, 2018

Author

Neville
Neville

Gone West folks....., United Kingdom



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Sometimes my imagination get's the better of me and then the pen takes over .. more..

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Retribution Retribution

A Poem by Neville



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